Update of sorts I guess.
Well Thursday I went to the ER with shortness of breath and my heart was going a million miles an hour. After I think every test they could run this is what they tell me "we THINK you have a blood clot in your heart". I asked what they needed to do to be sure one way or the other. They discharge me. Tell me to start taking Aspirin and just to come back if or when it happens again.
No idea what caused it. Blood work was impeccable with everything right where I want it or better.
I know there is a history of heart problems in my family but no real way to confirm it anymore.
Dealing with all of this has sent my Anxiety threw the roof. I'm unable to deal with any form of bullshit and just wanted to be left alone. This cost me my job as it caused confrontations with fellow employees and I snapped.
I know it shouldn't be an excuse but if you've truly never dealt with serious mental issues you just don't or won't ever understand how much this messes things up.
At this point I do not know what I am going to. I can't afford to stay in AZ as the cost of living is getting to high and the only form of income I have is my disability. I am open to suggestions on places to go with a decent gym and a VA hospital not to far away.
As I'm sitting in the hospital I realized I had zero plans for Marley if things ever went bad. I'm really thankful and beyond grateful for the one person who without question said she will always have a home with her and her pup.
Then it set in just how few people I have in my life anymore. But maybe that's what I deserve with how hard of a person I am to be around. #health#heartproblems#bloodclot#anxiety#depression#ptsd#bipolar#lost#alone#marleyandme#servicedog#ptsdservicedog#rescuedog#adoptdontshop#onlyloveiknow#sdmf#strongerthandeath#americanviking#supportmilitarymuscle#fucktheva#vasucks#followme#unemployed
September is National Recovery Month. It's been 10 years, 6 months, & 25 days since I realized that I was addicted to alcohol. My family, faith in God, therapy, AA, & fitness has provided me with the strength to remain sober. If you or someone you know needs help with addiction, please don't be ashamed of asking for help. Be proud that you're taking control of your life & truly beginning to live life. There's so much more to live for. God Bless. #Addiction#Sober#SoberLiving#OneLove