My boys aren’t sleeping again, so of course neither am I. Which seems like a good place to start, who even knows anymore. We are an island, the boys and I. We are often alone, not many visitors, no in real life friends, which is to say, I am my own best friend and I think I’m hilarious. So last night when I finally laid down at 2:30am and had to hastily get up because I remembered the wonder that is salt spray to my weird growing out hair I had to make a note, because I’d forget. Now I won’t only not forget, I laugh every time I see the cats butthole on the note and when I think of my youngest asking why old people take mirror selfies. That kid! Which helps me not obsess about my new neighbor. She’s moving in today and I feel anxious. The owner was excited and told me she’s a social worker. I shouldn’t feel any which way about that, but I do. It has been my experience that those that should know about trauma don’t know anywhere near as much as they think, also I saw her dismiss the landlord in a way that made my skin crawl and she went to Biola?! Fucking A! It is now well established I’m a neurotic snob, but also egads! Talk about a triple whammy! Sigh, alas, I think I’m funny.
Monday Monday Monday...
Find me with my Anxious Thoughts 👁
We have our notebooks custom made to our specs
• 30 sheets / 120 pages
• 190 gsm paper
• Off white/cream pages
• Acid free pages
• Saddle stitched binding
Pick ‘em up and shop all our goods
$9.99 ea or 2 for $14.99
"Scientists have demonstrated that dramatic, positive changes can occur in our lives as a direct result of facing an extreme challenge - whether it's coping with a serious illness, daring to quit smoking, or dealing with depression. Researchers call this 'post-traumatic growth'." - Jane Mcgonigal 💕✌️
Never sleeping ☕️
Give me all the coffee in the world, it’s Sunday but feels like a Monday
Living our days in caffeinated bliss trying to keep those anxious thoughts away
The mugs & notebooks are back in stock
I chose the picture above today because like a paint palette that contains lots of mixed colours, I have a lot of mixed emotions inside of me. I'm meeting with friends this afternoon in the city and I'm filled with all kinds of anxious feelings. These feelings have been building up inside for the past few days since we organised our meet up. Of course, it's Saturday and I'm worried everywhere will be super busy and I will start to become overwhelmed. I haven't felt this way about being in an area with a lot of people in years and it's worrying me that it's starting all over again. I'm trying so hard to focus my thoughts elsewhere but I just can't relax. I'm scared of my own self. I pray that these thoughts will pass, that I will be able to relax and enjoy some good company.
"It's not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It's necessary." - Mandy Hale
Important daily reminder: by investing in ourselves, we invest in our relationship with others by bringing our best selves to the table.
Happy Friday everyone! Check out my story for a #FollowFriday ✨💫💕
Sometimes you see a text or email and think “that was rude”. 😡 But was it? That’s the problem with those forms of communications, you can’t hear the person’s tone of voice. 🙅♀️ When you don’t want to speak on the phone though, it’s hard. Sometimes what could be a short, to the point email from a friend seems blunt or curt and you wonder, “did I do something wrong?” (Because you do that/obsess over social interactions when you have #anxiety ) or one word answer or short text message responses to your long messages about what has been going on (and it’s so difficult to express what has been going on that it was an effort and a half to share it with someone in the first place) are just painful to receive. 🙇♀️ What is the bottom line? Yeah, I pride myself on being #brave and #strong and I am a rock when I need to be, but many people seem to forget one thing- I am #sensitive . I am, especially in certain states. I overanalyze the sh*t out of everything. I know people probably answer some messages in haste or on the go, but I’d rather wait for a reply that isn’t going to send me into a fury because I think you don’t care or you are giving me mixed signals about your ability to digest the information I have shared with you. I am not attention-seeking, but when I am willing to open up to you, I do kind of hope you are paying attention?🤷♀️ And if you really say you understand me and want to help me or help me through a rough patch, please remember I am sensitive and I may interpret things differently than you. Rant over. 😐
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
„Let this be the year you start working on your weak spots, instead of fortifying them. Let this be the year you root out your insecurities, one by one. This new year, you may not hit the gym everyday. You may not curb your gargantuan appetite. This year will have dark moments and blue days of it's own. Yet, there's so much you can do. Maybe this year, you just ought to work towards a happier 'you', even if it sounds like a trite vanity. You deserve to give yourself one good shot. You need to start looking into yourself. 'Cause every soul is worth exploring. And I promise you: you'll never be disappointed in the effort you put in. May this be the year you become who you ought to be, even if it means turning back and returning to square one. This could be the year you strive towards healing. Let this be the year you realize who and what matters. Let 2018 be the year you focus the limelight on the nicer parts. Work towards shutting out all the acerbity. May this be the year you fill yourself with only positive energy. There will be crests and troughs, inevitably. There will be days you just can't do life. But embrace even these moments. Don't let them blemish your zeal. Channelize your energy into getting past these dark areas. And what's more? You just have to promise yourself to make this year yours, and you're half way there, already.“ —@jaydsters_21
Admit it. You feel rushed (you felt rushed in 2017) to do something, to be productive. You were encouraged to show your worthiness through production. (You secretly thought, “I must do something today,” and felt uncomfortable. Moving seemed to help a little but the discomfort resurfaced when you sat down.)
As the year comes to a close today, it’s easy to get anxious thinking there’s not enough time or that you haven’t done enough.
When that uneasy feeling rises within, stop. Don’t DO anything but breathe. Just take in your surroundings and the anxious thinking will subside. It’s called alignment and it’s amazing. There’s no pharmacy on earth that can provide the soothing that alignment does. It’s free, zero toxicity and is available 24/7. Way better than taking Valium or drinking to ease the emotional pain.
Don’t try to MAKE it go away; just shift your focus to the present moment for 30 seconds. Relax you shoulders and breathe.
God knows us completely. He knows us better than we know ourselves. He sees the motives behind our words and actions. We think we know ourselves, but as Jeremiah reminds us: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” Jeremiah 17:9.
Our minds and heart play many games to justify our behavior. Other times morbid introspection leaves us in a hopeless pit of false guilt and despair. But God sees through it all.
It is wise to pray the prayer of the psalmist daily. “God, you know me thoroughly. So search my heart. Test me and know my thoughts and cares. Show me the areas where I am causing offense.” As God searches our hearts, truth is revealed so we can deal with it.
What God wants is not morbid introspection, but Holy Spirit inspection. As he searches our hearts, we can repent and be set free. God’s searchlight brings repentance and transformation and leads to freedom.
God search our hearts so we can be set free from sin and its effects and find the life that is full, free, and everlasting.
Never stop praying! Even when you are tired and don’t have the energy to read or do anything just whisper one word to God! He knows everything about you, all your thoughts, absolutely everything. God will listen and respond to your every call. 😇“O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord. You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand!”
Psalms 139:1-6 #pray#prayer#anxiousthoughts#tiredbutpraying#listentogod#psalm139#christian#childofgod#heknowsyoureverythought#jesus#bible#bibleverse#power#salvation#strengthinjesus#psalms
"Watch your thoughts as you watch the street traffic. People come and go; you register without response. It may not be easy in the beginning, but with some practice you will find that your mind can function on many levels at the same time and you can be aware of them all." - Nisargadatta Maharaja ✌️✨💕 SO important, and always ongoing work in progress.
Hope you all had a lovely Xmas! Mine involved a bout of food poisoning but was lovely and relaxing nonetheless!
Working on the new website and hope to have it done in the next couple of weeks, as well as the e-book and first workbook 😊🎉
Eating clean and getting in shape is always hard. Being on a budget with anxiety can be a little more tricky. You go to the grocery store with a calculator and count every penny. You have to make sure you have enough money for the week. Enough for bills. Enough emergency money. Enough food for the week. Enough balanced foods because you can't afford nutritional help. You try apps but can't focus on it until you have your food for your meal plan. You have to make sure you don't have too much because you won't remember to freeze it and you'll just be wasting money. You have to make sure you have some very simple foods for the days you just can't talk your anxiety into letting you out of bed. You feel a bit insecure when people what you do your math and debate foods.
But then you walk up to the register .. And they compliment your healthy food selections .. Makes it all worth it! 😄
During a workout out, you try to look toward your goal.
When you think about your goal your mind begins to race. You think about how you still have to clean up from breakfast. Fine. Five minutes. No big deal.
But what about emptying the dishwasher .. Another five minutes, we can make it work. But wait. I go into work at two instead of three today .. Work .. A retail job .. A job that makes you miserable .. A job you only have to barely pay some bills paycheck to paycheck while you study for school .. Oh and don't forget about school .. A program you dreamed about for years but weren't ready .. A program that you were thrown into too early by someone who wanted to buy your love .. School .. You're four stages behind .. Four stages .. Your test was due two weeks ago .. You'll be terminated from the program if you don't get it done soon .. You'll throw your dream and four grand out the window .. You never go through with any of your plans .. What makes you think you can reach any of your goals?
You're just so lazy. You won't get anywhere in life.
Just go back to bed.
Meditation Monday: Martha or Mary —> “But the Lord answered her, "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42 (ESV) / / Heavenly Father, thank you for the gift of Your Son, Jesus Christ. Thank you for this good and perfect portion that satisfies all of our needs and fills our soul with peace. Thank you for sending us a Healer and Redeemer of our soul.
Forgive me Lord when I am worried and anxious about many things. Forgive me when my heart and mind are set on the cares of this world. Please fill my heart with contentment and peace. Help me to fully rest at the feet of Jesus. Help me to be a Mary in a Martha world. Open my eyes to the one thing that matters most, my Savior, Jesus Christ. Without Him we are all like lost sheep (Psalm 119:176), wandering around this world aimlessly. Help me to return to my Shepherd, the guardian of my soul. (1 Peter 2:25)
Lord, I pray for those lost sheep who are hurrying and scurrying and filled with worry. I pray they would hear Your voice and come running to You. I pray their eyes would be open to the one thing that can calm their anxious hearts, belief and trust in Jesus.
Lord please go before me this week, keep my heart from becoming worried and anxious. Help me to remember that You are the perfect portion that I need. I pray my cup would overflow with Your perfect peace. In Jesus' name, amen. -Anita Marie #powerofprayer#womanofhiswordblog#meditationmonday#scripture#wordofgod#womenofGodsword#anxiousthoughts#worry#perfectpeace#princeofpeace#jesuschrist#savior#shepherd
Never sleeping ☕️
Give me all the coffee in the world
Living our days in caffeinated bliss trying to keep those anxious thoughts away
The mugs & notebooks are back in stock
This last week I have been busy. It’s been nice, but now it’s slowing down - which means the anxious and depressive thoughts are coming full force. They are telling me I’m a failure. Telling me I’m going to unemployed forever. Telling me I’ll never make it. Telling me to give up. Listening to those thoughts is difficult. It does make me want to cry or give up. I know I can’t do that. I know I won’t do that. It doesn’t mean it’s not discouraging. So I keep applying, working hard and remembering to breathe - that is all I can do at times.
Anxiety is the thing that keeps you awake in the middle of the night for no real reason. It’s what creates crazy scenarios in your head that would never happen. It’s what convinces you that there’s a huge problem in your life that you HAVE to make better right.now. When in reality, there is no problem and you are totally ok.
It’s what makes you feel super silly (and sometimes more anxious) the next day, after you’ve unwillingly given in to your anxious thoughts.
Most people may not understand- but anxiety is not always a choice. Sometimes it comes out of nowhere and sometimes you can’t figure out why. It just does. And as much as you try to let go, sometimes you just can’t shake the feeling off and you blurt out things that deep down you know aren’t true.
I can’t explain why it happens. All I know is that every day I pray that God grants me some peace of mind, and some for those around me. That they are able to understand and know I love them. And that I know I am loved. I’m not screwing everything up, I’m just doing my best in this life. Everything is okay and will be okay. 🙏🏼 If you go through this, know that you too are okay.
You are loved and wanted and able. And I am here if you ever need someone to remind you. 💕🌸
Random fact: about 25% of the calories we take in every day are consumed by our brain's activity.
It's productive to completely switch off. As well as resting our muscles, it's totally OK and necessary to treat our brains to a rest. Netflix binge anyone? 😂✌️
I Am Badass. I Am Worthy. I Am Enough. .
"I’m trying to train my mind into believing that I don’t have to be the best at everything to be loved and to be confident. It’s a really tough lesson to learn. It challenges you to be inspired by others. It makes you look at others’ talents, not as a threat to yours. It makes you see the good qualities you have, even if you are not the most talented. It gets you to look at yourself in the mirror- know that you are imperfect, but still incredible. It’s being gentle with yourself. It’s pushing yourself. It’s forgiving yourself.
I am badass. I am worthy. I am enough. “
Click link in bio to read more !
Anxiety is a bitch. She hits you like a ton of bricks, leaving you feeling helpless. When she rears her ugly head, the best thing that you can do to take back control of your mind and your motions is to move. Let go, listen to music, drown yourself in sweet, sexy sounds that make you sweat and shake out the shit that weighs you down. When you lose yourself in the music, all of a sudden you catch yourself smiling, and it will feel like one of the most empowering sensations. Why? Because in that moment, you will realize that you are stronger than your anxious thoughts. I promise that this too shall pass, even if it feels like your world is caving in on you. In the meantime, move that body, girl 🔥🎶👏 #anxietyisabitch#anxiousthoughts#resiliencejunkie#strength#move#dance#shakeawaythenegativity#empoweringwomen#riseup#musictherapy#findyourinnerbadass
2:15am. Swell, another (basically) sleepless night; got a solid hour and a half, again. I’m super super restless and tried everything I could think of to go back to sleep. This happens every single time when I start restricting more again, can’t sleep thru the night even with sleeping pills. If I don’t wake up in the night then no problems but when I do, this is what happens. If it wasn’t this late/early Id make coffee because that tends to help. Regardless of why I wake up, ED thoughts come and are extremely loud, and I also perseveration on how much bigger I am now compared to previous times at my lowest point weight and get really bad/negative thoughts and anxiety. Though I feel overwhelmingly determined to reach a new lowest, break into a new lower weight range and start to strategize how, which then keeps me up more. I’m also still having terrible anxiety about doc appt on Friday- new doctor which is uncomfortable, not sure what he is gunna ask and so forth and still upset that they decided to just make me an appointment to meet with my Social Worker without me asking to, and I also got transferred to a new one that specializes in ED & had more experience working with ED patients. I just hate not knowing what to expect, especially since last time I was at this place was the time I got sectioned for ED stuff and admitted there and then transferred to another hospital and I want to avoid talking about that whole fiasco entirely. I’m just really stressed and need it to be Friday already just to get it over with. 😕 #eatingdisorder#anorexia#ana#ed#restricting#edthoughts#tothebone#itsundercontrol#imfinethankyou#anxiety#anxiousthoughts#cantsleep#tooanxioustosleep#insomnia#needsleep#needsleepnow#thestruggle
Side note: until I started with this account I never realized how much I actually vape 💨 ha. Would do anything to the @bumblefrogmixologyeliquids Christmas e-juice, ugh why so hard to get? #vape#vapeon#vapelife#itrelaxesme
That day when you think, ‘go on Sophie, wear that hat you treated yourself to’. The inner monologue shouts ‘WAIT, what happens if some teenage boys drive past and shout Indiana Jones or twat in the hat at you!’. Well inner monologue I defied you this time. Walked out the house and a lorry drove past taking my hat in a strong wind, I screamed like a small child had ran into the road when really it was just a felt hat.. I looked around to pretend to laugh at how funny I found it... no one else was laughing but me like an absolute crazy person with a beetroot red face. In embarrassment I stuff the hat back on and ran away forgetting it was now covered in mud and road juice. Had two hands firmly on it at the train station and I looked like the dad in matilda with it glued on #FFS#lovehats#confidence#lifesacatwalk#anxiousthoughts
No matter how hard we try, curveballs will always find a way to sneak in. It’s an inevitability of life, and that’s perfectly fine — if we are prepared to handle them!
December starts tomorrow and with it the season of shopping, parties, cooking, more shopping, socialising so it can feel especially hectic, rushed, overbooked and anxiety-ridden. So it’s the perfect time to put your focus on how you handle these stressors of life and make some tweaks to improve any areas that need a pick-me-up.
The thing about a worrisome mind is that it’s typically worrying about the future. This makes it extremely hard to be present, so being conscious of this is crucial. Practice being present and mindful of your current moment, the day you’re in right now, and with practice, you’ll notice the stress of tomorrow will dissipate over time.
Sometimes, when I feel particularly anxious, I focus on each of my senses. What do I smell right now? What do I see right now? What do I hear right now?
This brings you to the present moment and helps snap you out of your anxious thoughts.
Try it, it really works! What are your favorite ways to overcome anxious thoughts?