This year has been one of the hardest of my life. There were moments where I had to live minute for minute because thinking of what would happen in the next hour or day was absolutely unbearable. Yet, this year has by far been one of the best! Because of the hardship- the joy is that MUCH SWEETER. Isla has showed us pure joy. Watching her fight for her life - struggling to take a tiny breath- and then watching her laugh, cry, sit-up, crawl, clap, and STAND... takes my breath away and makes me SPEECHLESS! I wouldn't change a minute of this past year. I am grateful that God is alive and that He is real. His miracles live among us. His angels wear tiny red bows. #islagracepsarev#thanksgiving2017#downsyndromecutie#upsyndrome#t21#lifeisbetterwithyou#chd#chdwarrior#threeheartsurgerieslater#happybaby#janieandjack photo cried: @ivielaneandco
I always knew I wanted to be a Mom but the title of being a wife never seemed significant. There were no day dreams of wedding dresses or flowers, just the baby I would tote on my hip like the greatest accessory. With my personality being naturally stubborn and set in my ways, the thought of sharing my life with an equal sounded too complicated. The thought of needing someone made my overly independent brain quiver.
Fortunately for me they aren’t kidding when they say when you meet “the one” you will know. While at the time I completely underestimated what being someone’s wife truly meant, I knew I didn’t want to see a day without him in it.
While I consciously and subconsciously did everything I could to keep my guard up, he waited on the other side. His concrete routines have been a challenge for my spontaneity but every day we see the benefit of accepting our differences and letting them compliment each other.
We have grown together. We have learned what it means to be a team even when it’s hard. We are one. We have learned it’s not only ok but an absolute privilege to truly live for someone else. There is no greater peace than knowing a consistent love and partnership.
My arms are full of little humans like I always dreamed they would be but my greatest accessory will always be him. The one who chooses everyday to love me unconditionally and I him. I am forever thankful that God chose him and he chose me.