'Decisions made out of fear build a life of regret'
Something I have learned lately is that when you make a decision out of fear, you are not being true to yourself. Instead we should make decisions based out of love, out of hope, decisions based on what we want to happen, not the sometimes easiest or safest option.
This painting is called Fearless. It was named by one of my chemo nurses. Because I very nearly didn't get chemo. I was scared of what would happen to me. Scared of the drugs and the needles and the side effects. But I dread to think what would have happened if I'd given into that fear.
I recently framed this print and hung it in my bedroom as a daily reminder to always make my decisions out of love instead of fear.
Also $10 from every print sold is donated to 'Dreams 2 Live 4' @dreams2live4.aus 💕
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I am Vegetarian. I was trying to go vegetarian in my late teens and early twenties. This time I’ve actually accomplished my goal. Does animal flesh cause cancer? Studies say yes. However in my heart I don’t want to be involved with hurting animals. No one or nothing has ever died from eating vegetables. The most powerful and muscular animals on the planet are vegetarian. Protein isn’t an issue. Being vegetarian is a choice just like eating meat is a choice. I chose to be kind. #vegetarian#lifeaftercancer
When you have a free 45 minutes, you don't even bother getting changed. You get your workout in, quick shower and back out the door!👊🏻
My doc said I'm going to have to back to yoga and walking for a few weeks so I'm enjoying the weightlifting while I can!💪🏻
#FBF to the last manicure I was able to get w/@cutiepielz before #chemo ...during #chemo we are told not to get our nails done at nail shops to avoid infections due to our compromised immune systems....being on #Taxol my nails have become something completely different...they started turning black progressively and became tender then really painful 😣. Some of them are now lifting from the nail bed (even 1 month post chemo)..it hurts sometimes to a point, I wear band aids on some of my fingers..... this does not happen to everyone but I was warned it could and most likely would happen to me...and it did...so for any of my #breasties who are in treatment or about to begin...not to scare you but this is something you may experience!
I know strangers look at my nails and are probably like wtf lol...but you know what...I have been through way to much to care😉 #Nails#breastcancerawareness#YoungBreastCancerWarrior#Stage2#FightingCancer#TashaTheWarrior#Chemo#Taxol#AC#ChemoMeds#LifeAfterCancer
Oh and it can take up to 6+ months plus before my nails return to normal 😩😩😩 I think I may just paint them for my bday next week.
Writing my third book.
This book has been a labour of love, of hope, of darkness and pain and then a little more love.
I wanted to write a book that would touch people and move them, a book that had you thinking about it weeks after you'd finished it. I started it nearly 4 years ago, and for no reason in particular I gave one of the main characters breast cancer.
Well you know how they say life imitates art...(I'm wishing I'd given her a lottery win instead of cancer now)
I have spent the last few days working on the book, I'm getting lost in it and because I haven't worked on it for so long it's like reading someone else's story and I feel proud of it and engrossed in the story. I am glad my brain is finally recovering from chemo, enough that I can string a well constructed sentence together again and make this book available soon 💕
Do you know how amazing this #man is??? @joshcflowers_ shows up for me EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. He holds space for the big scary emotions, gets silly to celebrate random fun times, and is such a great life/business/love partner. And #fall is his favorite time of year! 🍁 Yay!!!
But seriously, being partnered with someone who's been given a diagnosis of #cancer is really, really hard 💔 And I'm so #grateful for him. Here's to my first #mushy social media post 🥂
PS... If you're into #mindfulness practices, he has a free #ebook here 👉🏽 @joshcflowers_ that I think is really, really good 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
I've addressed this before, but I'm going to beat a dead horse on this one. It REALLY irritates me when other people (ie people without cancer) don't allow cancer patients time to wallow in the unfairness of their situations. QUESTIONING IS NATURAL. Of coarse you're going to wonder why this terrible thing is happening to you! When you're feeling sorry for yourself, you have to remember that it's not YOU that has the problem, it's THEM. They are drowning in their insecurities. People want to believe they are in control. They want to believe that everything happens for a reason. They want to believe that the world is just...but sometimes it's just not. Why do some people try to commit suicide and fail while others who want to live tragically die? Why do innocent children get horrible diseases? Sometimes bad shit happens to good people. Having no reason or explanation for the injustices in life makes people uncomfortable. It scares people to think that if it can happen to you, it can happen to them. People want to believe that they will be rewarded for their good behavior and deeds. Don't believe me? Try Googling "Humans are egotistical by nature" and you will find plethora of articles addressing this topic. Unfortunately, I don't care if you exercise, or eat right, or go to church, or use natural products, or donate to the poor, or feed your dying granny with a spoon every night, you are just as vulnerable as the next guy. Yes, again, there are some things we can do to attempt to take care of ourselves and stay healthy, but none of us are 100% in control. A cancer diagnosis comes with a lot of emotions and feelings and we need the time to work through ALL of them, including questioning "Why me?". I know I sound like a broken record here, but the best thing you can do for a cancer patient is to offer them nonjudgmental, unconditional support. Be more like Miles the cat. 😻#girlsonchemo#lifeaftercancer#cancersurvivor#hodgkinslymphoma#cancer#chemo#cancersucks#chemosucks#lymphoma#cancerawareness#cancersupport#lymphomaawareness#bleomycinlungtoxicity#remission#fuckcancer#chemotherapy#bloodcancer#lymphomies#catsofinstagram
What started as frustration this week with some setbacks turned into motivating myself to take control again. The path won't always be smooth and some hills may be harder to climb than others, but no matter how tough it may seem, never give up.
10 week's since my last chemo. 10 WEEK'S! My hairs gotten a ton longer and it's starting to darken up a little (Yay!💃). I feel amazing besides the pain in my joints, which I found out this week could possibly be rheumatoid arthritis 😔. I had some blood work and x-rays done and get the results in a few weeks. So fingers crossed for good news!! I got to start back at work but with my joint pain I had to take a few days off to see a doctor, hopefully though I'll be back at it again soon. Life's slowly getting back to normal. I'm able to go out and do more that I enjoy which is a big deal and I'm grateful for everyday I get to spend with the people I love.
This morning I got a couple kiddos ready for school, ran my first mini triathlon in about 2 years, and helped launch a campaign to support early childhood education. Is there a chance I might be getting back to my old self again?!?! Trying not to get my hopes up, but I am SO stoked right now!
(Now to pray that my entire system doesn't go into shutdown mode. Please, body, please... you can do this. We are oooookay.)
#lifeaftercancer#swimbikerun#tritraining#IGotToUseThatHashtagAgain !!!! #🏊🏼♀️🚴🏼♀️🏃🏽♀️