6:11, sept 19, 2017:
You know what really sucks? Feeling like you have to beg people to stay in your life. Knowing that if you don't reach out to them, you won't talk at all. It's awful. I just want someone to talk to. Even if it's about stupid stuff. Or even as simple as seeing something on Instagram that I find funny, and having a friend I can tag in the comments because I know they'll like it too. Is that too much to ask? Why doesn't anyone stick around? Why doesn't anyone keep in touch? Why are people always leaving? Or am I the one always pushing them away?
Kinda feel like this recently, kinda feel a little lost, kinda feel like everyone is getting on with their lives and doesn't care anymore. At least I have the one best friend helping me through a really tough time, telling me baby steps to get me through everything, I don't know what I would do without him, letting me cry hysterically at him not knowing what anything is anymore and encouraging me even to do the smallest of things like smile, have a shower etc because at the moment I'm lucky to even get out of bed in the morning. Thank you Adam for being there for me xx #alone#nofriends#depression#hard#crying#sad#helpme
Solo workout this morning. If you watched my IG story you know I wasn't happy about it either.
But I set a goal to burn 500 calories and I did it! I was shocked I actually did cause I couldn't see what it was till I shut workout mode off. 👏🏼👏🏼for solo cardio days👏🏼👏🏼