"I’ve not ever been diagnosed officially, but I’ve struggled with anxiety a lot over the years. I’m a pretty anxious person, and I have been ever since I was a little girl. I can remember being in the second grade and going to the nurse’s office because I thought I was having a heart attack. With each little discomfort or pain in my body I’d immediately become anxious, fearing that something was really wrong with me (the young hypochondriac that I was). I would feel myself getting sweaty, faint, and nauseous, and as a small girl, I couldn’t reconcile it with anything other than a heart attack. I figured I had to be dying or something to feel so terrible. I went to visit the nurse almost daily during my second grade year.
My greatest fears at the time stemmed from being afraid of getting sick away from home. Sleepovers were a nightmare. If I could even make it through the night, I’d have to call my mom multiple times to have her talk me through my panic attacks. When I didn’t make it and asked her to pick me up, I remember watching the street lights reflect on the ceiling of the car through my tears. I was always so disappointed in myself that I couldn’t just be “normal” and that my mom had to come get me. I was the only 13-year-old I knew that couldn’t handle one night away from home." Struggle with anxiety? You're not alone. Read more now in "Overcoming the waves of Anxiety and Panic Attacks" now - visit thegritandgraceproject.org and click 'health & beauty' 💛 #gritandgracelife#anxiety
UGH I feel icky today y'all. I literally slept last night, got up and went to lunch with a friend, came home and went back to sleep. When I got up I felt a little better, so I decided to workout. Didn't drink my energize (dumb), and then felt like I was dying all the way through. I'm glad I got it done, but I decreased my reps on some of the moves and didn't use weights on the last round which is weird for me.
Anyway, the point I'm trying to make here is, know that there is a middle ground.
When I was doing Shift Shop, one of my favorite things @chrisdowningfitness said was, "try before you modify." Give the heavier weights a shot, do the hard exercise first and then modify if you need to, always push yourself. I tried to use that strategy today too. I was tired and I could have easily skipped my workout and told myself I was listening to my body and resting, but I decided to try. It may not have been as good of a workout as I normally get, but it's a heck of a lot better than sitting in bed doing nothing at all.
You can still listen to your body without skipping your workouts completely. And I'm not saying push yourself when you're sick or hurt and honestly can't but when you're exhausted and just feeling in a funk, at least try.
This is a lifestyle and a journey. Not every day or every workout is going to be perfect. BUT, you still have to show up and give it your best every single day. The real results (both mental and physical) come from the days when you're tired, when you're unmotivated, when you think you just can't do it. You can. You just have to be willing to try.
Let people think what they want, being judgmental is their problem; not yours. Just keep doing you and continue focusing on yourself. Always do whatever makes you happy. Let go of anything that isn't helping you become a better version of yourself. New Moon= New beginnings.🌚
To all my sassy #FALLing4Yoga friends! You're sooo rocking these poses! Thanks for joining us- and for any inquiring minds- there's still time to join and catch up! Tomorrow is a fallen triangle! Let's get weird with it!😏
----Pose line up----
Day 1 🍂Fallen Angel or Fallen Side Crow🥀
Day 2 🍂Fallen Bow🥀
Day 3 🍂Fallen 8 Angle Pose🥀
Day 4 🍂Fallen Triangle🥀
Day 5 🍂Fallen Dancer
Day 6 🍂Fallen Tree
Day 7 🍂Fallen Goddess of Mercy
👉🏻👉🏻How to play and be eligible for prizes:
Follow all hosts and sponsors. Repost the flyer and caption with the hashtag #FALLing4Yoga Tag 3 yogi friends to help spread the love. Tag all hosts and sponsors in your daily posts using the challenge hashtag. Set your account to public so we can see your posts. Have fun, be safe, and get creative!
First things first.. NEW HAIR HEYYY. ✂️ (thanks @robynnlloy!)
Date night with my husband at my favourite restaurant! Grilled chicken club with sweet potato fries/curry mayo. SO GOOD!! #sorryforthepoorfoodlighting (@jordanshrinks am I any closer to becoming you with this food pic?) @the_grand_banker
Today I shared a story with some complete strangers about a truth I went through but never spoke about.
About something that was apart of my life for years yet no one knew or really asked because it was invisible on the outside. Something I’ve shared briefly with a couple people but never spoke too loudly or to too many.
Today, I shared with complete strangers that I suffered from an eating disorder for many years. That along this struggle I started and stopped without raising any flags or telling many people at all. When this past of mine would come up in any verbal way it was in a way simply stating the fact and closing the conversation.
Today, I shared a part of me that I never knew was needing to be shared. For me, I never thought my struggle was worth telling, that if no one noticed, why bother. That others had struggled more, so my own story was trivial to theres. I didn’t get hospitalized, I didn’t get put in treatment, I didn’t get confronted, so for me, it was just for me to deal with.
This consumed 5 years of my life, a struggle in the dark and silence.
I told my story today and it is now longer in the dark or silent.
If you are reading this I want you to know your story matters too. No matter the severity, no matter the length of time, no matter if you find yourself saying it’s not as bad as others.
Your struggle, your story, is not alone. You are not alone, and you are worth receiving love and compassion. ❤️
I was always that skinny guy.. & till this day I still think I’m skinny weighing like 157-162 right now. Still needing another 15-20 pounds!!!! My brother always said” watch give it a few years and you’ll struggle” which I am. I feel like all my weight gain is in my abs!!!👎🏽It’s harder but I love the struggle!! Specially not even going to a gym. Only street workouts and random stuff as you guys see lol#baby#gains#pushpullgrind#progressnotperfection#fitness#calisthenics#streetworkout#hungry#putinwork
This girl stole my heart... A couple weeks back I had my first official nursing interview, and in that interview I was asked “where do you see yourself in 5 years”. As I began to answer the question I laughed a little because I knew I was about to give them a step by step answer. Honestly it sounded pretty type A which is funny because I’m not sure anyone would EVER say I’m a type A person 😂 (organized chaos is more my jam.... hence the type is nursing). I’m not sure if the interviewer thought I was BSing the or not.... but I was 100% serious in the goals that I have set out for the next couple of years..
One of the goals that I had for the coming year was to land a position in the ER by Sept 2018. Welllllll... BS or not it looks like I’m going to be able to cross that goal off my list a little early because I officially have a full time ER RN job come Jan 2018. So excited to be moving forward already into are area of nursing that I truly enjoy. Looks like I’ll be finding new gym home for 2018 💃🏾
Hi, this is me at 115lbs. I’m at a point in my life where I’m comfortable posting shit like this. It’s not easy for someone who’ve had an eating disorder. But I’ve really taken a lot of time out in the last couple of years to accept myself, my body, and everything in between. I’ve learn to appreciate a lot of things and now I’m at a point in my life where I’m ready to challenge myself and take my fitness to a competitive level. I’ve always wanted to compete in bikini and powerlifting at least once. Bikini, cos I had to prove it to myself that I am no longer a prisoner of my past. That I can get shred and I won’t be that crazy obsessive chick I once was. Powerlifting, cos I was first introduced to weights as a powerlifter. My first transition from being a cardio bunny was the big3 so what is more glorifying than owning what started me, right? (: plus lets be real, how empowering is it to know you’re a woman smashing heavy ass weight. SO THATS THE GAME PLAN! RN, I’m really just battling between which one I want to do first... so far I’ve gotten a lot of people tell me powerlifting first then bikini. If you’ve read this far, comment down below what you think I should do first. 💪🏽 I just got back from a pl meet and it’s really making me wanna compete in pl first... 🤔 EITHER WAY LETS GET IT FIT FAM 👊🏽 HAPPY SATURDAY and I hope you’ve spent it on some quality time with your friends and family 🙃
So as the 2017 bodybuilding calendar comes to a close, I decided to reflect on the season to gauge the progress on my development over the months and I'm happy to say that I'm pleased with the results.
The first pic was my very first competition ever and was at The ABC Inter-Gym Amateur show in May when I was just training for the enjoyment of it. Although I was eating clean, I really didn't follow any structured workout routine and knew little to nothing about posing or quarter turns, let alone how to execute them properly. Thank you @netbajan for showing me the ropes where this is concerned, your teachings are invaluable and helped me achieve my very first win in the tall class of the Men's Physique category.
The second pic was a few months later at Nationals in August. This is when I started to adjust in my diet and training routine. This also marked when I became a sponsored athlete for @jbcnutritionbarbados . A tremendous shout out to @jbcnutritionbarbados for the amazing support which undoubtedly helped me secure another 1st place in my category.
The last pic was the recently concluded Darcy Beckles Championship show in November. With some more tweaking to my food intake and revamping my workout routine (I even added a little cardio to my workouts 😏) I was able to fend off my toughest competition yet at this regional show and managed to place 1st in my class once again.
I've made significant progress over the last 5 months and I'm still trying to find my 'sweet spot' as to what works well for me but I'm much closer now. I look forward to 2018 as I will be bringing a much better package than I produced and showcased in 2017.
Thanks to all my friends who supported me in my journey and my fellow athletes who continue to inspire me to be the best athlete I can be - see you in 2018.
Thanks also to @lotustouchbeauty and @kristyl.beauty for making me stage ready and @serenityloungespa for your massages which assisted greatly. Lastly, I'd like to thank @anomar34 for assisting me in showcasing my best physique to date. @krissieboops @rosie_ellis246 @shane.m.howell @jeannine_jones @gorilla_fit_ #progressnotperfection#gymshark#motivation#aesthetic
I had a tough time pushing through my double workout tonight. My strength isn't what it used to be, and for whatever reason that discouraged me. I had to have the "shut up and get your ass moving" pep talk with myself and then I was good to go. I sat here for a few minutes while I was cooling down from the workout, thinking about how many times I've had to do this. I was overweight growing up. I had my first baby and decided enough was enough. I told myself that I was going to make a change once and for all, and I did. I started using insanity (a super awesome body weight exercise program). I didn't follow it religiously, but I used it a few times a week and ate clean and I lost 50 pounds in 6 months. I lost the weight, but what I gained was so much more. I had a new love for life that I had honestly never had before. I felt great, I was in shape, and I was confident in who I was. That was just the beginning. Eventually my weight spiked up and it was another battle to get it back down. But I did it... again. This time I used t25 and the 21 day fix. Then... ovary issues that led to surgery and two babies back to back later, here I am.. starting over. But just like before, I am NOT giving in. I started AGAIN because I am in love with the woman I am when I am taking care of myself and feeling my best. I love the mother, wife, friend, sister, daughter, etc. that I am when I am feeling my best. That feeling, getting back to THAT feeling, is why I started this time. #notgivingup#strong#fallinlovewithlife#changes#startagain#progressnotperfection#rememberyourwhy#doitforyou#keepgoing#insanity#21dayfix#t25#coach#accountable
🔥Release fear; darkness is simply the absence of light. Embrace change; light up the abyss with your internal flame. This is a time for death, re-birth & rising.🔥
WELCOME TO REAL LIFE:
In just a little over 10 days my physique has completely changed, and not in ways I’m happy with, I feel it weighing me down physically, mentally, and emotionally. My second job has started and I have 50 million additional things pilling up on my plate. I’m exhausted, hardly have time to myself, I’m not finding that I have time to cook or eat the right food because I don’t even have time to go to the grocery store. My horses have been great trying to take care of me but even my rides now are exhausting me like they didn’t before.
I had a complete breakdown mid workout today and cried for the first time ever during a workout and had to call it early. I don’t EVER quit Wods but I had to today..... Life is hard. It’s fickle, challenging, busy and it’s super easy to forget to take care of yourself. I’ve been going so non stop that today I finally reached my limit and my body gave out on me. It’s scary, frustrating and hard. I’m trying not to get down on myself because looking at all I’m doing honestly I’m surprised it didn’t happen sooner. (Hindsight)
So I’m going to do two things:
1. At least for the time being I’m going to have to back off on my training. My body isn’t capable of my normal intensity right now. 😭
2. I’m going to look into shipping pre-made meals to myself from a company. My nutrition is super important to me and I want to maintain it and if I don’t have time I have to spend the extra money to make sure it’s maintained.
Keep pushing forward but be aware to take care of yourself always as your number 1 priority. I constantly forget to put myself first and I’m learning the tough way it’s not right. Make time for you and your health you’ll be much better off because of it.
Not even two hours passed after dinner and I was hungry. My mind was flooded with thoughts of ice cream, cookies, and wine. I realized I hadn’t had my superfoods shake yet today so I made that instead. It’s still a struggle to make good choices. But the reward is great. I’m so much happier with my decision and it was delicious!