#tb to the very lush lighting in h&m changing rooms 😍 (it's not a tb because of the lighting , I go in h&m a lot, just an old photo lollll)
Today has been a very long day 😪 actually got my ass out of bed this morning which is probably why... but I've held up okay 💪I did another session in my tutor support about mental health, which I'm very proud of myself for doing 😄 however they didn't listen much which A) made me really anxious as I thought I was doing a terrible job and B) made me very angry because mental health is soooo important!
Need a good sleep tonight as I have CAMHS tomorrow 😭 it's the follow up to my psychiatric assessment and they're probably going to change my meds again 😧 stressed about it but trying to see positive outcomes ☺
Sleep well everyone ❤
To jest ważny dla mnie post. Zrobiłam bardzo duży postęp, mimo, ze dla kogoś może nic takiego.
1 zdjęcie - prawdziwa, radosna ja, nigdy nie wchodząca na wagę
2 zdjęcie - ja w szpitalu w tegoroczne święta wielkanocne, wyglądam jak smierć
3 zdjęcie - ja w zaawansowanej chorobie. Nawet makijaż nie był w stanie ukryć mojej choroby i smutku. Uśmiech to nałożona maska. A na twarzy górują zapadnięte policzki, chore, które odbierają uroku. Jestem tak drobna, ze moja twarz wydaje się nienaturalnie duża
4 zdjęcie - ja przez cały ten rok choroby. Smutna, zła, nieszczęśliwa i zagubiona, udająca kogoś kim nie jest, zimna... vs ja po 10 kg więcej
5 zdjęcie - waga 39 vs 48 kg -> pierwszy raz nie muszę ubierać mnóstwo warstw ciuchów i nie trzęsę się z zimna, nawet gdy innym jest ciepło. Pierwszy raz ciuchy nie wiszą na mnie jak na kościotrupie
6 zdjęcie - 10 kg różnicy, a dużo zdrowsze ciało i umysł. Powoli odzyskuje równowagę 🙏🏻 Oczywiście jeszcze długa droga przede mną, szczególnie pod względem psychicznym, ale jak przejrzałam te stare zdjęcia to aż przeszedł mnie dreszcz... nie pozwólcie chorobie się opętać. Nie warto, naprawdę żadna figura nie jest warta takiego cierpienia. Wszystko to pozory szczescia, a rzeczywistość jest ZUPEŁNIE inna. Zastanów się 2 razy, życie masz jedno. #anoreixa#anoressianervosa#anoreksja#anorectic#anoreksjarecovery#recovery#anafighter#anafight#food#eatforlive#anafghter#ortorexia#ortoreksja#extremehunger#fuckana#pokonacanoreksje#edproblems#edrecovery#edproblem#edanorexia#edfamiliy#nutridrink#instafood#eat#foodstagram#foodpic#foodpost#recoveryana#recoveryday#foods
Ive created this oversized rainbow hair bow to show some support for the wonderful project #teamrainbowblack created by the oh so lovely @artist_sarah_woods 😘💚 I am also tagging @gothicpinkprincess for inspiring me to make it 😘💜 #recovery#mentalillnessawareness ✌
(Just everyday lunch,needed sth to post)
I am PISSED at myself...
My body s retaining water and I'm stuffing my greedy face... more than 3000cals tday and I'm still craving more...
Even though my stomach s full my head wants more?!
I already had a break down earlier bc my body s huge and I feel disgusting but still I'm being a greedy pig😔
I can't even take laxs bc I ran out of em which means I'll wake up super puffy and gross.
What am I doing?! I don't want this summer to be as disgusting and uncomfortable as the last 2yrs...
My Insta game has no been strong lately! I've hardly had any time to be on social media, definitely not complaining though! Neither is the bean since I finally had the time to make her favorite carrot, oatmeal , peanut butter treats! 🥕
Who has got sore quads and sore calves after the @ultratrailaustralia ?
TBM is running a $99 sports massage recovery offer until the end of May for anyone who took part in the UTA
You can book a session online at www.thebodymechanic.com.au
Recomiendo la proteína que sea orgánica o isolate.
Que tenga menos 5 g de azúcar y carbs. Y que tenga por lo menos 20g de proteína por servicio. Solo beber luego de entrenar. O en una merienda, pero no todos los días. .
📌 Es una recomendación que te doy, lee los datos y verifica que no contenga algo que te haga daño. #recovery#proteinshake#fittips#kfztips#trainer#kevinfitnesszone
Stop paying attention to the things that don't matter, & start paying attention to what goes on around you.
If you've never thought about how the animal that's on your dinner table got there
you should start thinking and doing some research!
Found these new treats on sale in @superdruguk , they had a range of chickpea crisps as well, and seed bars which I would definitely recommend.
Good if you're on the go and don't have time to prep!
I'm not focused on the calories, just the nutrients (tbh I had more than one packet) 😋 💪🏻
Every fucking day is a struggle. But you know deep down inside you that some are better than others so you keep hope because you know it will get better and you just have to hold on until it. The storm is hard but the rainbow will be worth it. --🇫🇷-- " Ptsd pourrait sérieusement être la cause de ma mort. Le pire c'est que personne ne comprend a quel point c'est difficile de vivre tous les jours " Chaque jour est une putain de lutte pour rester en vie. Mais tu sais que certains jours sont meilleurs que d'autres alors tu gardes espoir parce que tu sais que ça ira mieux et que tu dois juste continuer. La tempête est violente mais l'arc-en-ciel qui s'en suit vaut la peine d'être vu.
Today I was at my therapist and we have completed a formular for my health insurance together 🙈
She will send it to them during the next days so that they can work on it and hopefully approve another inpatient 🙄
I didn't felt able to choose a clinic so I #gaveupcontrol and let my therapist decide which clinic will be her choice for me. It's not so easy as we thought to find a clinic which my health insurance would pay 🙊
#thankyou so much for standing by my side and fighting for my health every second week again 😊
This is a #vegan curry with coconut milk, rice and vegetables 🍜
🔹120g di carne di girello 🍖 🔹100g di pomodori con origano 🍅🍃 🔹150g di pane integrale 🍞 🔹20g d'olio evo 🍶
Buonasera a tutti! Oggi è stata una giornata davvero difficile 😶
Tutto lo stress che avevo accumulato per la scuola è esploso in una volta 💣
È stata la prima volta che ho perso una battaglia con il cibo da quando ho iniziato questo percorso, è stata la prima volta che ho ceduto alle voci 😔
Si che il percorso sarà pieno di cadute e che l'importante è rialzarsi, ma è stata una strana sensazione 🤔 da una parte -a quanto pare prevalente- quella felicità malata e dall'altra quella "tristezza" razionale 😐
Comunque poi ho fatto una lunga dormita prima di fare merenda e mi sono sentito meglio 💆♂️
Dopo le prove di musica poi sono andato a fare un piccolo giro con la macchina con la mia insegnante di clarinetto e così ho parlato anche un po' con lei 🚗
Appena a casa ho preparato la mia cena -senza nessuna restrizione 👊-: 🍽
#carne di girello arrostita 🍖🔥 e #pomodori spolverati con #origano 🍅🍃 conditi con #olio evo 🍶, #pane integrale tostato ad accompagnare 🍞💥, e poi #mela 🍎
Adesso finalmente una serata in totale riposo 😌
Terrò la mente occupata e lontana dai #pensieri 🌬💭 in vostra compagnia 👀 e magari recuperando qualche puntata 😏📺 ... A domani 👋
Buona notte a tutti voi! ✨
and the happy news..I am officially WEIGHT RESTORED! I’m still overwhelmed and emotional. Long post ahead (sorry!) 🔸This was an extremely hard post because I’ve NEVER posted a picture on social media of myself in a bathing suit. I don’t have many solo pictures during my eating disorder partially because I was ashamed, I was afraid of myself, and I knew deep down past all the denial that I looked horrifying. The left picture was taken August 15th, 2015 after going to the hospital. From head to toe I was lifeless, weak, and fragile. If my hand was flipped backwards, it would’ve probably broken. This was also the starting point of the hardest battle to come: recovery. I’ll admit I was not proud of myself for how I first handled recovery. I refused, restricted, lied, and relapsed. I was in this middle ground for over a year. Going to college and making this account were two of the best things I did for myself. Physically distancing myself from triggers and receiving daily inspiration from you all helped me in more ways than possibly imaginable. I can’t express my gratitude enough to all of those who I’ve followed, my doctors, and my family members. The picture on the right was taken yesterday. This image brings me joy--I am FAR happier, stronger, and healthier. For those in recovery like myself, it’s damn hard (an extreme understatement I must add). It tests us physically, mentally, and emotionally. It pushes us past what we think we are capable of. We have cried, thrown tantrums, picked fights, and given into Ed. HOWEVER, it’s only through great struggle that we can find strength and personally grow. Fight, fight, FIGHT because I know the willpower is within me and you. SO many times I believed I could NOT do it. But today I can say I did it, I truly did.
I have still yet to receive my period, but I’m grateful for what I have accomplished so far. I don’t consider myself a recovery master, I’m far from it. I still have so much to learn and I want to see myself gain a little more. But for now, I’m thankful.
🔶If anyone ever needs someone to talk to, I’d be HONORED. Thank you all a million, I can’t emphasize my appreciation enough 💕
#mindfulmonday got off to a hot start today thanks to the #headspace app!
I've been a bit overwhelmed lately with so much going on in my life and I've gotten out of the habit of intentionally practicing #DBT skills. So I went back to the basics!
I did a double #mindfulness session today: one with #headspace and one with the #Calm app! Both are very good! I can't afford a subscription to either of them so for now I'll just do whatever free ones are available! #warriorforhope