I have been in a lot of physical pain lately, from numerous maladies; ear infection, TMJ D and even infected feet (wtf). It has been going on 5 weeks now, so I was just sitting here feeling my spirit start to crack a bit, from another night of pain. Then I remembered that a beautiful, young Australian woman; #NicoleEvans , was doused with an accelerant and set alight by her fiancé less than a week ago. It sure put things in perspective. I bet she would swap me all my issues to not have to endure that kind of unfathomable nightmare. I could list a thousand expletives, but I think it's enough to say that the guy is a psychopathic piece of excrement that should be wiped from the face of the planet as if off the bottom of an old shoe. I grew up in a DV household and then suffered it as an adult and I'll tell you what, I'm fucking over these arseholes. I don't care what the do-gooders say, they can't be rehabilitated. They are anomalies born without the capacity for empathy. They've gotta go. The so called experts are talking round and round in circles, looking for answers but asking all the wrong questions. There is an Apex predator on this orb and it ain't us. It's those pieces of shit. It's about time society opened their eyes. The Inuits call them, 'Kunlangeta', and when asked by an Anthropologist how they dealt with them, they replied that, 'Somebody would push them off the ice when no-one was looking.' Nuff said.
Might as well get this over with..... As you all know I am a survivor of child abuse and domestic abuse.... I have forgiven my abuser of that... But I'm afraid the story never ended there.....
There's another reason I left Alabama. As much as I hate to admit it, this past year has been the absolute worst year of my life, an if I could go back two and half years ago to undo something I would be able to save myself from a future of pain and regret.
I've been hiding this awful truth for about a year now because I thought no one would believe me and i felt trapped in a way to where i would be harmed of i had tried to leave.
Others that surrounded me during this time period may not view it as this but what you saw WAS NOT what I saw in my eyes.
I know what I'm about to say shall bring hell upon my ass for the next couple of weeks, but these past few days, I find myself no longer able to keep quiet. NO ONE knows this and before you accuse me of lying, never EVER would I make up something this serious up....
I have survived child neglect, domestic abuse.... And sexual abuse.
I want you all to know I'm out of this situation and have been for the past few weeks thankfully. Im with a new person and in a new home. I'm well taken care of and not forced to do anything I dont want to do. If you have any questions or concerns of what I confessed you may ask me through DM or messenger of FB. Thank you for taking the time to read this and I hope you believe in me.
I survived once again.
Продолжаем говорить про #абьюз . У абьюзера смещены понятия о добре и зле. В этом случае, женщине просто необходимо доверять себе, полагаться на собственную интуицию. Он хочет вытащить из вашей головы ваше восприятие реальности и пересадить туда своё. Верьте своему здравому смыслу. Вы не сошли с ума. Имейте ввиду, что абьюзер временами нежен, щедр и заботлив. В такие моменты вам может казаться , что ваши отношения снова станут прекрасными . Однако, все по кругу. Может ли абьюзер измениться ? Только, если сам поймёт , что должен это сделать . Поэтому, единственное , что вы можете предпринять для этого, так это поставить его в ситуацию , когда у него просто не будет другого выхода #лилиябормусова#психологказань#насилие#эмоции#семья#отношения#любисебя#манипулятор#stopabuse
Anyone can hit back its not a matter of when or where but the ones who have the courage to dump everything in are no less than an ocean. Yes if taken for too long even the ocean can get polluted maybe that's why ocean has waves to clean itself up. I know this because I was one of them and it has changed me but if there's one thing I can tell you about me is it has made me strong, it has made me - me. Until today I was ashamed of that and to be very honest I thought I was never enough but it was no less than of an illusion because we will never be enough and unless and until we accept that and let alone make peace with it, we'll always feel lost and out of order. I'm walking towards my light from now on, I'm letting me - heal me and I will succeed not immediately but definitely and I hope you do too. ( ps I miss the Monday poetry newsletter thing which we had anyone of similar mindset? )
If I thought the 2 weeks that I was living at my cousins was a blur, so were the days, weeks and months following my return home. Being sexually abused for a year was easy compared to being called a LIAR, ignored and punished for "making an embarrassment" out of myself and my family. My deeply dysfunctional family. *
As a victim, you learn to "go outside" your body - some people float above it - some go to some other place....being where you are is just too painful. Survival mode. I continued to float outside my body. I was numb - void of all feelings, except a deep seated HATE for my step-father. I couldn't believe I was back under the same roof as this man. At the same time, a small part of me was PROUD of myself, as I had the balls to finally stand UP to this beast and he would never FUCKING touch me again. EVER. Even if that meant killing him! That's how much I hated him. *
It took me a long time to get over my anger at my mom. I felt almost more betrayed and abandoned by her. After all - she took his side - didn't quite believe me. Or did she?! I honestly didn't know. But I couldn't hate her. I felt bad for her - she was weak. She was staying with a man who abused her one and only daughter. If I stayed mad at her, it meant that both my parents had failed me - it meant I was unloved. I couldn't think that - I wouldn't allow it. Those feelings would continue to get pushed down. *
So, I went to family therapy, as required and started seeing the school counselor on a more regular basis. I could share more in private than I could at our family therapy sessions. Not surprising I couldn't open up about my abuse in front of my abuser. (Who thought THAT was a good idea?!?). Some of my larger/extended family started to "show up" for me and support me. Some believed me.....some wanted to know how many times it happened. Like, seriously?! I felt like some people in my family didn't know what do do or say around me. *
My mother started to come around but I still wasn't sure if she believed me. I also didn't care - I only knew that I needed my mom....whether she believed me or not! I needed her to take MY side.....
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Today's the day! Bobbie Becerra speak about her inspirational story of recovery from child abuse and domestic violence.
Together we aim to prompt discussion on the issues that are inspired through her memoir Learning to Take It: How I grew to accept abuse. We invite you to listen and get involved, come out and join the discussion with panel guest and get participate in a Q & A with Bobbie Becerra
There will be an Opportunity Drawing for PRSSA members to earn a graduation sash! Let's build awareness together!
You can RSVP on Torolinks: https://torolink.csudh.edu/organization/PublicRelationsStudentSocietyofAmerica/calendar/details/1303850
Don't miss the opportunity to take one step closer toward ending abuse! Join @torotactics TODAY at 1PM in LSU 324/325 and start talking!
Meet Bobbie Becerra and help spread awareness about the much needed discussion on sexual and domestic abuse. Join us in helping understand the first hand experiences victims encounter and the lessons that follow. *PRSSA opportunity drawing for a graduation sash will take place, come support our client and get the chance to graduate with a PRSSA sash* #sexualassaultawareness#starttalking#breakthesilence#nomeansno#stopabuse#bobbietalks#LokerStudentUnion#CSUDH
Don't miss the opportunity to take one step closer toward ending abuse! Join us today at 1pm in LSU 324/325 and start talking!
Meet survivor Bobbie Becerra and help spread awareness about the much needed discussion on sexual and domestic abuse. Join us in helping understand the first hand experiences victims encounter and the lessons that follow. *PRSSA Opportunity Drawing for a graduation sash will take place, come support our client and get the chance to graduate with a PRSSA sash* #sexualassualtawareness#starttalking#breakthesilence#stopabuse#nomeansno#bobbietalks
Very excited to share that my student Jenna's PSA was recently selected as the winner of the St. Louis Cardinals "Great Save Teen" Public Service Announcement contest! You can watch this powerful video by visiting the link in my bio or the link http://lhstv.weebly.com. St. Louis students were invited to take part in the National Teen PSA Peer to Peer Crime Prevention Project. Students created a 30 second message on any topic that raises awareness with the goal of preventing teen victimization. As a recognized charity of Major League Baseball, Jenna's winning video and Ladue Horton Watkins High School will be recognized on the field during a pre-game ceremony with the St. Louis Cardinals. #stl#stlcards#kindervision#powerofvideo#PSA#stuvoice#jea#adechat#stopteenabuse#stopabuse#bethechangeyouwanttoseeintheworld
Good evening beautiful!💙 I love you!💓 God loves you!💜 So today's quote again has to go along with whatever you have gone through, whether it's sexual assault, sexual abuse,sexual molestation like myself, suicide, bullying/bullied what ever you have gone through! So this quote I mean you could put some thought into but there really is no need to! Everyday is a second chance! Every day is another chance to get up, and fight! Every day, is a second chance to let go of that grudge! Every day is a second chance to get caught up and read your Bible, and to be in relationship with God!
Everyday is a second chance! What second chance do you need? What's going to happen if you break up with your boyfriend who yells and puts violence in your home? What if? That is one of the main questions we ask everyday, what if? Well everyday is a second chance so make that change! Either way Gods going to love you just the same!/// Again April is sexual assault awareness month, I would be honored if you tag me your teel/blue!
You can not love someone or expect someone to love you if you pose any of these traits. Manipulation if used incorrectly is ABUSE!
This is for both Men and Women. ❌If you are with someone and you tell them that they are hard to love and you constantly talk down to them. #thatsabuse ❌If you are with someone and you tell them that they should kill themselves. #thatsabuse ❌If you are with someone and you constantly body shame them. #thatsabuse ❌If you are with someone and you have cheated on them and you made them think its their fault. #thatsabuse ❌If you are with someone and you can't control your anger and you hit them. #thatsabuse
I can go on and on....BUT we are in a world where abuse is running rampant and nothing is being done about it. People are committing suicide because they can't face what's being done to them. If you or anyone you know is going through this ask them to seek professional help. Its time to put a STOP TO ABUSE!!!! #stopabuse#stopchildabuse#stopsuicide#stopdomesticviolence#abuseadvocate
What if you feel worthless?
People said "know your worth" to me all the time when I left the abuse.
I would answer "I know" or "I will"...but honestly, I had no idea what that meant. Especially since I didn't like one thing about myself..inside or out. So at that point, to "know my worth" would mean to know that I was nothing?...a giant zero?
I am far removed from the abuse now. I like myself and while there are always going to be things I'd like to improve, I don't beat myself up about them anymore...I just work on them. I still don't say "know your worth" to people (although I appreciate the people that do say it and that said it to me..only love behind those words), I think it's "LEARN your worth". And maybe even more so for me, the term "worth" and "deserve" don't resonate very much. These days I don't just accept things in a reactive way. I actively choose who and what I want in my life. Some people don't make the cut and that is a good thing - boundaries. No, I didn't DESERVE to be abused and yes, my life is WORTH it, but it's more about being the CEO and President of your own life. You make all the calls from now on.
This seminar was my 3rd in Slovakia. Major K. Komarov has a PhD in combat psychology. Who is one of the most knowledgeable and thorough instructors of our time. I was fortunate to have lived in Europe at a time while learning from some of the best in their fields. Not to mention visited beautiful countries!! 😄 The Stealth Method is unique in its own right!
Workshop Inquiry at: Info.firstname.lastname@example.org
Never in a million years would I think we would lose you. But here I am writing this post. I will forever cherish the memories that only you and I hold, and remember the times we have shared. The hardest part of this all is I feel like everyday this is going to end and we are gonna see your big smile once again. You will forever be in our hearts we love you and we miss you. Rest In Peace @shyeanne_xoxo
You were a spectacular friend and I'm blessed with the fact that I was able to be one of the many people that got to know you.
XOXO 😘 -@kingsloann