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We've been going to this bakery for as long as I can remember. It's the best place to get some yummy homemade pastries 😋
I had a friend ask me earlier what was the difference between being "in recovery" vs being "recovered". As someone who has struggled with an eating disorder for nearly a decade, it's hard to put into words because there is no set definition for what being fully recovered means. There are also those who don't even know if they believe in full recovery. Honestly, my recovery looks like not acting on behaviors. No purging, no fasting, no counting calories or chewing + spitting food. No keeping a scale in the house that I can become obsessive about. Not avoiding certain foods out of fear of becoming "fat". My recovery looks like eating what I want, when I want. No longer following rules of only eating at certain times. My recovery looks like learning to love my body. Feeding it, doing yoga, wearing crop tops (which I never thought I would do). My body isn't perfect. Neither is my recovery, but I refuse to go back to old ways. I refuse.
I'm in a weird place of no longer hearing ED's voice. But yet I still restrict and have trouble getting in my meals and drinking enough water. In spite of that, I'm creeping nearer and nearer to my highest weight. While that terrifies me and I feel "fat", I refuse to fall back into old patters of safety within my eating disorder. I have come too far. I want others to know that recovery, even being fully recovered, is possible. It takes time. Patience. A great support team and a surrender to the disease. It is possible to be well 🌿
{August 19, 2017}
We've been going to this bakery for as long as I can remember. It's the best place to get some yummy homemade pastries 😋 I had a friend ask me earlier what was the difference between being "in recovery" vs being "recovered". As someone who has struggled with an eating disorder for nearly a decade, it's hard to put into words because there is no set definition for what being fully recovered means. There are also those who don't even know if they believe in full recovery. Honestly, my recovery looks like not acting on behaviors. No purging, no fasting, no counting calories or chewing + spitting food. No keeping a scale in the house that I can become obsessive about. Not avoiding certain foods out of fear of becoming "fat". My recovery looks like eating what I want, when I want. No longer following rules of only eating at certain times. My recovery looks like learning to love my body. Feeding it, doing yoga, wearing crop tops (which I never thought I would do). My body isn't perfect. Neither is my recovery, but I refuse to go back to old ways. I refuse. I'm in a weird place of no longer hearing ED's voice. But yet I still restrict and have trouble getting in my meals and drinking enough water. In spite of that, I'm creeping nearer and nearer to my highest weight. While that terrifies me and I feel "fat", I refuse to fall back into old patters of safety within my eating disorder. I have come too far. I want others to know that recovery, even being fully recovered, is possible. It takes time. Patience. A great support team and a surrender to the disease. It is possible to be well 🌿 {August 19, 2017}
just getting started .
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📸: @cjgcapture
just getting started . . . 📸: @cjgcapture
Transgender Dysphoria Blues (2014) by Against Me! Both a musical and spiritual rebirth for Laura Jane Grace. A fantastic album. Link in bio. #againstme #punk #punkrock #music #newmusic #2014 #vinyl #vinyljunkie #vinyladdict #vinylrecords #vinylcollector #vinylcollection #vsco #vscostyle #vscocam #vscogood #vscofilter #vscodaily #vscomania #vscostl #stl #stlouis #saintlouis #igdaily #instadaily #instagood
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📸: @kaczacmarek
🎴 . . . 📸: @kaczacmarek
"What kind of doggo are you?"
"Let's boop noses!"
Curious alpaca at the World's Fare Heritage Festival in Forest Park.
"What kind of doggo are you?" "Let's boop noses!" Curious alpaca at the World's Fare Heritage Festival in Forest Park.
Barely hanging on to reality
Barely hanging on to reality
I took this photo a few years ago, and took some time today to re-edit some of the tones. It was the first photo I took where I thought I might be okay at this whole photography thing. It certainly is far from perfect, but it helped me find motivation to keep going. 
Look for those small victories that keep you chasing your goals. And if you still lack motivation, go sit under a cool looking tree. Maybe you'll be inspiring someone else to keep going.
I took this photo a few years ago, and took some time today to re-edit some of the tones. It was the first photo I took where I thought I might be okay at this whole photography thing. It certainly is far from perfect, but it helped me find motivation to keep going. Look for those small victories that keep you chasing your goals. And if you still lack motivation, go sit under a cool looking tree. Maybe you'll be inspiring someone else to keep going.
#currentlycraving more Belgian waffles topped with berries. SO good ✨
Did someone say "park!?" Madison loves the park... and picnics... and picnic food... Today is the World's Fare in Forest Park. Can't wait to check it out!
Did someone say "park!?" Madison loves the park... and picnics... and picnic food... Today is the World's Fare in Forest Park. Can't wait to check it out!
thirteen.
thirteen.
champagne cola.
champagne cola.
blood colored bathroom.
blood colored bathroom.
I love that I got to capture one of my best friends in her zone at the studio!
I love that I got to capture one of my best friends in her zone at the studio!
Looking forward to #Apollo17 in September! Super excited to be performing with the creatives there. Don't miss this.
Looking forward to #Apollo17  in September! Super excited to be performing with the creatives there. Don't miss this.
200 кг. 4 по 10. Это был ад. Каждый подход делал как последний. В зубах полотенце. В уши бомбящая музыка. На 4ом подходе тренер начинает неожиданно скидывать по 25 кг, сил нет, но я ебашу без отдыха: 175 на 7, 150 на 10, 125 на 15, 100 на максимум, ещё и сам себя заставлял - ещё 1, ещё 1, ещё. Ору и рычу на весь зал, блины летят, ноги взрываются, кровь бьёт в голову, она раскалывается, думал вырублюсь или сдохнуть к чертям. Короче говоря - это было что-то. 🏋️👟
Зато какая сейчас эйфория... это мой наркотик и это того стоит 😌🤤
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#vsco #russia #mma #lift #fight #crossfit #workhard #murmansk #vscocam #vscostl #vscorussia #vscogrid #instagram #l4l #uncalculated #photoshoot #sport #gym #exploreeverything #criminal #killeverygram #sportlife #muscle #workout #featuremeval #arsenic # #nofilter #shotaward #summer #athletes
200 кг. 4 по 10. Это был ад. Каждый подход делал как последний. В зубах полотенце. В уши бомбящая музыка. На 4ом подходе тренер начинает неожиданно скидывать по 25 кг, сил нет, но я ебашу без отдыха: 175 на 7, 150 на 10, 125 на 15, 100 на максимум, ещё и сам себя заставлял - ещё 1, ещё 1, ещё. Ору и рычу на весь зал, блины летят, ноги взрываются, кровь бьёт в голову, она раскалывается, думал вырублюсь или сдохнуть к чертям. Короче говоря - это было что-то. 🏋️👟 Зато какая сейчас эйфория... это мой наркотик и это того стоит 😌🤤 . . . #vsco  #russia  #mma  #lift  #fight  #crossfit  #workhard  #murmansk  #vscocam  #vscostl  #vscorussia  #vscogrid  #instagram  #l4l  #uncalculated  #photoshoot  #sport  #gym  #exploreeverything  #criminal  #killeverygram  #sportlife  #muscle  #workout  #featuremeval  #arsenic  # #nofilter  #shotaward  #summer  #athletes 
One more from last night because I mean 😍😍
One more from last night because I mean 😍😍
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📸: @cjgcapture
⚡️⚡️3 . . . 📸: @cjgcapture
It's Friday, I'm in love. 💕
It's Friday, I'm in love. 💕
Always a great morning at @alldaymia. If you're in the Miami  area stop by for a Ethiopia Guji pour over . Tasting like 🍑🍑peaches🍑🍑 ALL DAYYYY! 📸@dmo305
Always a great morning at @alldaymia. If you're in the Miami area stop by for a Ethiopia Guji pour over . Tasting like 🍑🍑peaches🍑🍑 ALL DAYYYY! 📸@dmo305
Running into this weekend like...
Running into this weekend like...
Woodfired Somun hot and ready for you!
Woodfired Somun hot and ready for you!
Yay for Friday, friends!!! This morning on the blog we're rounding up our fave fall tops so you can get stockin' up! Also, we've finally figured out our newsletter 🙈🙈 so if you'd like to keep up, subscribe on our blog! Link in bio for it all. 😘 #fallfashion #ontheblog #astrthelabel
Yay for Friday, friends!!! This morning on the blog we're rounding up our fave fall tops so you can get stockin' up! Also, we've finally figured out our newsletter 🙈🙈 so if you'd like to keep up, subscribe on our blog! Link in bio for it all. 😘 #fallfashion  #ontheblog  #astrthelabel 
#FeelGoodFriday: Congrats to new homeowners, Merhawi and Meseret! Yesterday morning, these two received the keys to the home they helped build! We're so happy and excited for you two! 🏡😁💚
#FeelGoodFriday : Congrats to new homeowners, Merhawi and Meseret! Yesterday morning, these two received the keys to the home they helped build! We're so happy and excited for you two! 🏡😁💚
Nashville bound, but first...
Nashville bound, but first...
Who needs stock photography?
Who needs stock photography?
Hope you had a jolly good day! As I start to get ready to leave next week for Saint Louis, I think about how wonderful this summer has been and how amazing it was getting to connect with new people! Thanks so much for working with me this summer🔆 I had a blast going on new adventures with you all ❤️see ya soon Saint Louis 🤘🏼🖤
Hope you had a jolly good day! As I start to get ready to leave next week for Saint Louis, I think about how wonderful this summer has been and how amazing it was getting to connect with new people! Thanks so much for working with me this summer🔆 I had a blast going on new adventures with you all ❤️see ya soon Saint Louis 🤘🏼🖤
I can't take a food photo for shit but this hummusssss. 😍 (and the tahini & the pita & the spritzers & I'm drooling just thinking about it) #fangirling
I can't take a food photo for shit but this hummusssss. 😍 (and the tahini & the pita & the spritzers & I'm drooling just thinking about it) #fangirling 
Leaving STL in less than two days and onto the next adventure in South Carolina.
Leaving STL in less than two days and onto the next adventure in South Carolina.
Gahhhhhhhhh. I just spent the evening with these two, and all I have to say is...I think it was worth having to reschedule four times ✨🙌🏻😍
Gahhhhhhhhh. I just spent the evening with these two, and all I have to say is...I think it was worth having to reschedule four times ✨🙌🏻😍
Together through all of life's adventures 💕
Together through all of life's adventures 💕
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📸: @cjgcapture
🕒 . . . 📸: @cjgcapture
Bowie forever. ✨
Bowie forever. ✨
We're super excited to be at @treehousenetwrk's 3rd Anniversary Party! Come stop by our booth and learn how we're building homes, building hope and building St. Louis! 🎉🏡☺️
We're super excited to be at @treehousenetwrk's 3rd Anniversary Party! Come stop by our booth and learn how we're building homes, building hope and building St. Louis! 🎉🏡☺️
Death rides with me. 
@van_jovi got me this rad pin. Party reaper!
#vscocam #vscostl #deathrideswithme #partyreaper #chromebags #beerme #nnr
Can’t let shit keep you down ever. Take from it what you can; learn, push back, and strive. Be your own light in total darkness
Can’t let shit keep you down ever. Take from it what you can; learn, push back, and strive. Be your own light in total darkness
Just the girls 💙
Just the girls 💙
Developing💭
Developing💭
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📸: @kaczacmarek
🎴 . . . 📸: @kaczacmarek
#TBT in honor of my college days when I ate whatever I wanted and didn't have a care in the world...especially not regarding student loans. Today #ontheblog I'm sharing 4 things I wish I had known about student loans while I was in school. 💎👑 (Link in Bio) #RoyaltyinReality #CaneGang
#TBT  in honor of my college days when I ate whatever I wanted and didn't have a care in the world...especially not regarding student loans. Today #ontheblog  I'm sharing 4 things I wish I had known about student loans while I was in school. 💎👑 (Link in Bio) #RoyaltyinReality  #CaneGang 
The Threads Worldwide Fall Limited Collection features exclusive pieces that will make your style pop. Stop by Rodan + Fields Skincare Launch / Threads Worldwide Fall Preview on Saturday to see what new treasures we released this season. Head to our FB Events page for all the details!
www.allisonyoung.threadsworldwide.com
The Threads Worldwide Fall Limited Collection features exclusive pieces that will make your style pop. Stop by Rodan + Fields Skincare Launch / Threads Worldwide Fall Preview on Saturday to see what new treasures we released this season. Head to our FB Events page for all the details! www.allisonyoung.threadsworldwide.com
New chairs to choose from!
For availability and pricing, please send a message or call (314)842-7300.
New chairs to choose from! For availability and pricing, please send a message or call (314)842-7300.
I'm not looking at you.... im looking past you🙄💁🏽‍♂️
I'm not looking at you.... im looking past you🙄💁🏽‍♂️
When your new apartment is walking distance from here , life is good. | #stlgram #vscostl #thymeofmylife
Rolling out Pide for today's lunch @citygarden Come get yours!
Rolling out Pide for today's lunch @citygarden Come get yours!
@dazeemaee swimsuit edition
@dazeemaee swimsuit edition
So just for a moment, let's be still.
So just for a moment, let's be still.
Sorry for being MIA lately. Check out this recent shot of @beruss4 at @theclixgroup. Shot with window light only.
Sorry for being MIA lately. Check out this recent shot of @beruss4 at @theclixgroup. Shot with window light only.
lost '96
lost '96