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Take time to enjoy the view .. even on a hurried lunch break👌 #visitphilly
Take time to enjoy the view .. even on a hurried lunch break👌 #visitphilly 
I’ve found the times I feel the most despair is usually during times I’m the most self absorbed. When I focus my attention elsewhere (number 1 being my #children), I feel a sense of purpose and drive. It’s something you can’t get from selfishness.  #untilwemeetagain #moife #momof3 #selfish #selfabsorbed #happiness #astateofmind #selfishness #leasthappy #mostselfish #thoughts #thoughtoftheday #writersofinstagram #transformationtuesday #widow #youngwidow #widowhood #grief #griefsupport #lifeafterloss #griefandloss #liveforthereunion
I’ve found the times I feel the most despair is usually during times I’m the most self absorbed. When I focus my attention elsewhere (number 1 being my #children ), I feel a sense of purpose and drive. It’s something you can’t get from selfishness. #untilwemeetagain  #moife  #momof3  #selfish  #selfabsorbed  #happiness  #astateofmind  #selfishness  #leasthappy  #mostselfish  #thoughts  #thoughtoftheday  #writersofinstagram  #transformationtuesday  #widow  #youngwidow  #widowhood  #grief  #griefsupport  #lifeafterloss  #griefandloss  #liveforthereunion 
#TuesdayTruths

I thought I would take a few of your minutes on this snowy Tuesday morning to re-introduce myself! 😚

Hi!  I’m a single mama of 2 incredible boys...here is a tiny glance into life as #ThisIsUs 
Our life was forever changed almost 7 years ago when we lost my husband and my boys father. Life changed in an instant for us.  I was lost as a person, let alone as a mother.  So I trusted God and his journey he has planned. We’ve had many, many down days but we had even more UP days! 
Our life isn’t doom & gloom. We are more like Rainbows 🌈 & Unicorns 🦄! With each person that asks “How’d you do it” I answer, I had to. I didn’t have a choice, you just do it and so would you.  You learn very fast the things you want in your life, and the things you don’t. Learn to love yourself FIRST.  And definitely to LIVE LIFE, because life is so short! 👩‍👦‍👦
Forever Grateful 🙌🏽 Thankful ❤️ & Blessed 🙏🏽
#TuesdayTruths  I thought I would take a few of your minutes on this snowy Tuesday morning to re-introduce myself! 😚 Hi! I’m a single mama of 2 incredible boys...here is a tiny glance into life as #ThisIsUs  Our life was forever changed almost 7 years ago when we lost my husband and my boys father. Life changed in an instant for us. I was lost as a person, let alone as a mother. So I trusted God and his journey he has planned. We’ve had many, many down days but we had even more UP days! Our life isn’t doom & gloom. We are more like Rainbows 🌈 & Unicorns 🦄! With each person that asks “How’d you do it” I answer, I had to. I didn’t have a choice, you just do it and so would you. You learn very fast the things you want in your life, and the things you don’t. Learn to love yourself FIRST. And definitely to LIVE LIFE, because life is so short! 👩‍👦‍👦 Forever Grateful 🙌🏽 Thankful ❤️ & Blessed 🙏🏽
Ain’t this the truth?!? As someone who was trapped in an #eatingdisorder for 12 years, I used food as a way to cope with feelings I didn’t want to deal with. I then used exercise as a form of punishment. Not an enjoyable cycle to be stuck in. 
Years later, after a lot of hard work, I may still have some times of #emotionaleating, however, I’ve changed my view of food and exercise. It’s not the enemy anymore. Food and fitness still directly effect how I feel about myself—but I’m using this to benefit myself. When I eat nutritious foods and move my body, I feel good.  When I feel good, I want to eat nutritious food and move my body. Exercise has helped deal with the stresses of my new life and everything that comes with it. If I didn’t have this new #mindset, I would have self destructed by now. 
It IS possible to changed old thought patterns. It IS possible to change your lifestyle. It IS possible to stick with things. 
Now #digdeep and go after what you want. 
#bulimiarecovery #widowwarrior #widowhood #momofgirls #strivingforbalance #iamworthit
Ain’t this the truth?!? As someone who was trapped in an #eatingdisorder  for 12 years, I used food as a way to cope with feelings I didn’t want to deal with. I then used exercise as a form of punishment. Not an enjoyable cycle to be stuck in. Years later, after a lot of hard work, I may still have some times of #emotionaleating , however, I’ve changed my view of food and exercise. It’s not the enemy anymore. Food and fitness still directly effect how I feel about myself—but I’m using this to benefit myself. When I eat nutritious foods and move my body, I feel good. When I feel good, I want to eat nutritious food and move my body. Exercise has helped deal with the stresses of my new life and everything that comes with it. If I didn’t have this new #mindset , I would have self destructed by now. It IS possible to changed old thought patterns. It IS possible to change your lifestyle. It IS possible to stick with things. Now #digdeep  and go after what you want. #bulimiarecovery  #widowwarrior  #widowhood  #momofgirls  #strivingforbalance  #iamworthit 
knitting makes me feel calm and let me avoid to have the flashbacks or panic attacks. #knitting #cableknit #mittens #knittingaddict #southwestairlines #bwitodtw #ptsdsucks #widowlife #widowhood #iloveyou #imissyou
この美味しいピーナッツはいつもお義父さんへのおみやげ⛄️義理のお姉ちゃん夫婦からの贈り物の毛糸でお義母さんにミトンを編むことにしました❄️
家族との時間は本当に大切。🌈
#BWI to #DTW #southwestairlines #shortflight #knittingaddict #iloveknitting #formom #familyreunion #iloveyou #imissyou #tripswithdavey #widowhood #widowlife #ptsdsurvivor
I needed a double take on this. @thewass did such an incredible job taking pictures for @widowdarkthirty! ❤️🕷🖤
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The new Valentines Day line is trickling out of the designers corner. Already the newest Spider Leggings are 🔥
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Check out the fitness line to grab gear to sport at your Cupid fun run or benching for Love. ❤️💋
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#widow #widowdarkthirty #widowdark30 #widowdarkswole #widowhood #fit #fitness #fitgear #fitwear #clothing #fitfam #fitnessgirl #fitnessmodel #fitstagram #fitspiration #trx #training #workoutgear #workout #exercise
I needed a double take on this. @thewass did such an incredible job taking pictures for @widowdarkthirty! ❤️🕷🖤 .. . The new Valentines Day line is trickling out of the designers corner. Already the newest Spider Leggings are 🔥 . . Check out the fitness line to grab gear to sport at your Cupid fun run or benching for Love. ❤️💋 . . #widow  #widowdarkthirty  #widowdark30  #widowdarkswole  #widowhood  #fit  #fitness  #fitgear  #fitwear  #clothing  #fitfam  #fitnessgirl  #fitnessmodel  #fitstagram  #fitspiration  #trx  #training  #workoutgear  #workout  #exercise 
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 91: Feel the warmth of a fire.
*NEW BLOG POST*
(Link in Bio)
“And all the perfect moments I had dreamt of gradually reversed back into the dreams they originally were.”
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#darlingholdmetightly #blogpost #love #widow #strength #loss #bradystrong #widowhood #balance #invincible
(2/2)
People keep telling me how great I seem to be doing. Which I believe them to an extent, because at least I can get out of bed each day and even make my bed every day. I’ve never been more sure of myself and the confidence that has grown within me after this monumental loss amazes me. I am a badass, plain and simple. Some days I feel empowered, not all days but some. I wear my badge of widowhood with pride and honor. I truly believe my strength comes from him. I feel as if he is the one helping me get through. I have no other explanation other than that. I was told he would be holding my hand through this, and I am starting to believe that is absolutely the truth. I have surprised myself these last 6 dreadful months. But don’t let my disguise of strength fool you. I am still hurting more than I ever have. It hasn’t become easier, it’s just become different. Daily I must somehow accept my new life without the existence of him. I know he exists in another form, but that’s just not good enough for me, yet somehow it has to be. I have to keep going, not only because I have no other choice, but because he’d want me to. I am still trying to make him proud every day. I sometimes think I can hear him telling me how incredible he thinks I am and how proud he is for all that I have accomplished through my grief.

There are still reminders of him everywhere I go. His loss is still there, literally 100% of the time it is somewhere wandering through my mind. The absence of him will ALWAYS be present in my life and I just have to embrace that. When you’re faced with something that you didn’t choose but will be eternally a part of your life is a very difficult reality to accept, but that’s all I can do, accept it and use it. I can use the loss of Justin, I don’t know exactly what that looks like yet, but I do know I want to use it to help others in similar circumstances.  I won’t let this defeat me. I have to reclaim my life and shine on. I know that is all he would want me to do. Keep going. Just keep going.  @stillkickinco
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#widow #widowlife #widowwarrior #hywc #hotyoungwidowsclub #widowhood #widowed #warrior #stillkickin #loss #grief
(2/2) People keep telling me how great I seem to be doing. Which I believe them to an extent, because at least I can get out of bed each day and even make my bed every day. I’ve never been more sure of myself and the confidence that has grown within me after this monumental loss amazes me. I am a badass, plain and simple. Some days I feel empowered, not all days but some. I wear my badge of widowhood with pride and honor. I truly believe my strength comes from him. I feel as if he is the one helping me get through. I have no other explanation other than that. I was told he would be holding my hand through this, and I am starting to believe that is absolutely the truth. I have surprised myself these last 6 dreadful months. But don’t let my disguise of strength fool you. I am still hurting more than I ever have. It hasn’t become easier, it’s just become different. Daily I must somehow accept my new life without the existence of him. I know he exists in another form, but that’s just not good enough for me, yet somehow it has to be. I have to keep going, not only because I have no other choice, but because he’d want me to. I am still trying to make him proud every day. I sometimes think I can hear him telling me how incredible he thinks I am and how proud he is for all that I have accomplished through my grief. There are still reminders of him everywhere I go. His loss is still there, literally 100% of the time it is somewhere wandering through my mind. The absence of him will ALWAYS be present in my life and I just have to embrace that. When you’re faced with something that you didn’t choose but will be eternally a part of your life is a very difficult reality to accept, but that’s all I can do, accept it and use it. I can use the loss of Justin, I don’t know exactly what that looks like yet, but I do know I want to use it to help others in similar circumstances.  I won’t let this defeat me. I have to reclaim my life and shine on. I know that is all he would want me to do. Keep going. Just keep going.  @stillkickinco • • • #widow  #widowlife  #widowwarrior  #hywc  #hotyoungwidowsclub  #widowhood  #widowed  #warrior  #stillkickin  #loss  #grief 
(1/2)
It’s been six months since you had to leave me down here in this dark and scary place. Six months!? I don’t even understand how I have lived half a year without you next to me. Living life without you has made these six months feel like an eternity, yet that day, only 184 days ago feels like yesterday. 
Six months since I’ve held your hand or kissed your sweet face. Six months since they pulled me off your body. Six months since I cried onto your lifeless chest. Six months since WE were planning for our future with our long-awaited baby on the way. And six months since all that was taken from me. No matter what strength I have gained through the loss of you, I don’t think there will ever be a day where I can understand why this happened. I now believe not ALL things happen for a reason. There can’t be a justified reason for a lot that happens in our terrorizing world. (Continued in next post)
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#widowhood #widow #widowwarrior#hotyoungwidowsclub #hywc #widowlife #loss #grief #miscarriage #husband
(1/2) It’s been six months since you had to leave me down here in this dark and scary place. Six months!? I don’t even understand how I have lived half a year without you next to me. Living life without you has made these six months feel like an eternity, yet that day, only 184 days ago feels like yesterday. Six months since I’ve held your hand or kissed your sweet face. Six months since they pulled me off your body. Six months since I cried onto your lifeless chest. Six months since WE were planning for our future with our long-awaited baby on the way. And six months since all that was taken from me. No matter what strength I have gained through the loss of you, I don’t think there will ever be a day where I can understand why this happened. I now believe not ALL things happen for a reason. There can’t be a justified reason for a lot that happens in our terrorizing world. (Continued in next post) • • • • #widowhood  #widow  #widowwarrior #hotyoungwidowsclub  #hywc  #widowlife  #loss  #grief  #miscarriage  #husband 
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What opportunities are you missing by staring at closed doors? Turn the knob. Open the door. See what's on the other side. You will unlock your potential when you open the door to new possibilities.
What opportunities are you missing by staring at closed doors? Turn the knob. Open the door. See what's on the other side. You will unlock your potential when you open the door to new possibilities.
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 90: Say "No." To plans, to people, to anything that doesn't serve or excite you.
#ForcedJoyProject , Day 90: Say "No." To plans, to people, to anything that doesn't serve or excite you.
Enjoying breakfast with some real ones. Sharing love, tears & laughter, the best of times. Thank you Faust for bringing us together🙏💕🎶 #neverforgetfaust #kissinglou #😚
Enjoying breakfast with some real ones. Sharing love, tears & laughter, the best of times. Thank you Faust for bringing us together🙏💕🎶 #neverforgetfaust  #kissinglou  #😚
For your preview of my book go to www.awidowsguidetogrief.com  #thenewnormal #awidowsguidetogrief #grief #loss #widowhood #widows #author #illawarramercury
When the only thing getting warm during cuffing season is the bench 🤨 produced by @drugs_beats for free download of #danneytannahklubep link in bio full video as well #cuffingseason #soundtrack #georgeduke #redwine #netflixandchill #netflixandchillbymyself 😔#singleparent #widowhood
I have my interpretation of this poem. I leave it entirely open to yours.
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@vv.poetry
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#vvpoetry #vvthoughts #poeticjustice #poeticthoughts #poetica #bymepoetry #poetryofinstagram #poetsofig #poetrycommunity #poetsofinsta #readinglist #spilledink #poetryisnotdead #trainstation #waiting
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 89: Go see "I, Tonya" and reflect on your childhood dreams
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First, the movie is just spectacular. Second, in the late '80s/early '90s I was obsessed (OBSESSED) with figure skating. I dreamt of becoming an Olympic figure skater and I recorded all the competitions on old VHS tapes so I could rewatch them. Nancy, Oksana, and Tonya were household names. Third, and most importantly, ice skating was something Brad and I loved to do together. He was awful but would hold my hand and spin me around the rink like we were pros. He used to always say it was the only thing he was bad at and loved anyway (luckily for Brad, he wasn't bad at much). It's been years since I've been on the ice, and not sure I'll get the same joy without my partner holding my hand, but seeing the movie definitely set a small fire in me to get out there again. 34 isn't too old to start training for my Olympic career, right?
#ForcedJoyProject , Day 89: Go see "I, Tonya" and reflect on your childhood dreams . First, the movie is just spectacular. Second, in the late '80s/early '90s I was obsessed (OBSESSED) with figure skating. I dreamt of becoming an Olympic figure skater and I recorded all the competitions on old VHS tapes so I could rewatch them. Nancy, Oksana, and Tonya were household names. Third, and most importantly, ice skating was something Brad and I loved to do together. He was awful but would hold my hand and spin me around the rink like we were pros. He used to always say it was the only thing he was bad at and loved anyway (luckily for Brad, he wasn't bad at much). It's been years since I've been on the ice, and not sure I'll get the same joy without my partner holding my hand, but seeing the movie definitely set a small fire in me to get out there again. 34 isn't too old to start training for my Olympic career, right?
Six years. 
Today marks six years since we lost Sweet Pea's daddy. A wonderful husband, father-to-be, son, brother, uncle, cousin, friend. 
So much has happened in these 6 years, and i know he would be extremely proud of her. 
She didn't know him when he was alive, but she knows him now, and says that she misses him. 
I am so incredibly grateful for the relationship she has with his family. ❤
Six years. Today marks six years since we lost Sweet Pea's daddy. A wonderful husband, father-to-be, son, brother, uncle, cousin, friend. So much has happened in these 6 years, and i know he would be extremely proud of her. She didn't know him when he was alive, but she knows him now, and says that she misses him. I am so incredibly grateful for the relationship she has with his family. ❤
Lou’s last Eagles Game with his older brother Gary! @solome52 I remember this night so clearly, Lou was so excited to go but more so to spend time with his bro! Love you bro-in-law & thank you for the pics! #MatosBoys #NeverForgetFaust #FlyEaglesFly 🦅
Lou’s last Eagles Game with his older brother Gary! @solome52 I remember this night so clearly, Lou was so excited to go but more so to spend time with his bro! Love you bro-in-law & thank you for the pics! #MatosBoys  #NeverForgetFaust  #FlyEaglesFly  🦅
"and in the end
The most important piece of advice  that my past has given me:

Is to enjoy life while you are living it.
You can never know 
Which moments will be the ones
That you'll remember and when happiness will hit you.
So be open for anything at any time.
Do not fret over the past.

But learn from it and make new memories every day.
For there is only one life and one chance." #life #liveyourbestlife #lifeisshort #wellnesscoach #wellness #lifeafterloss #widow #widowhood #lifecoach #noregrets #learnfromyourpast  #griefawareness #griefjourney  #lifeisshort #coach #grief #widow #inspire #liveeverymoment #cherishthemoments
"and in the end The most important piece of advice that my past has given me: Is to enjoy life while you are living it. You can never know Which moments will be the ones That you'll remember and when happiness will hit you. So be open for anything at any time. Do not fret over the past. But learn from it and make new memories every day. For there is only one life and one chance." #life  #liveyourbestlife  #lifeisshort  #wellnesscoach  #wellness  #lifeafterloss  #widow  #widowhood  #lifecoach  #noregrets  #learnfromyourpast  #griefawareness  #griefjourney  #lifeisshort  #coach  #grief  #widow  #inspire  #liveeverymoment  #cherishthemoments 
“I know some people search the world
To find something like what we have
I know people will try, try to divide, something so real
So till the end of time I'm telling you there ain't no one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling. No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you.” #forever #teamrhodes
“I know some people search the world To find something like what we have I know people will try, try to divide, something so real So till the end of time I'm telling you there ain't no one, no one, no one Can get in the way of what I'm feeling. No one, no one, no one Can get in the way of what I feel for you.” #forever  #teamrhodes 
What if what I'd felt wasn't fear after all? Maybe the reason for the resistance to going to an open mic had more to do with timing, or situation …. or desire.  Last night, in front of an audience of magnificent women from RED I strutted onto the stage and shared my alter ego, Candy Kincaid. She was a truth telling, balls to the wall, southern oracle from Texas. And she could talk to dead people!  She shared a story of going out on a blind date and being bored to tears by the fellow, then insulted by his DEAD mother. The story spilled easily from my lips, I laughed, I snorted, I swore, I played. And the audience played back.  Last night there was no fear at all, only the stimulating, lit up feeling of being alive. Read on for more about that journey: http://ow.ly/DrOj30hL5TU  #overcomingfear #overcomingobstacles #widow #widowhood #survivingloss
What if what I'd felt wasn't fear after all? Maybe the reason for the resistance to going to an open mic had more to do with timing, or situation …. or desire. Last night, in front of an audience of magnificent women from RED I strutted onto the stage and shared my alter ego, Candy Kincaid. She was a truth telling, balls to the wall, southern oracle from Texas. And she could talk to dead people! She shared a story of going out on a blind date and being bored to tears by the fellow, then insulted by his DEAD mother. The story spilled easily from my lips, I laughed, I snorted, I swore, I played. And the audience played back. Last night there was no fear at all, only the stimulating, lit up feeling of being alive. Read on for more about that journey: http://ow.ly/DrOj30hL5TU #overcomingfear  #overcomingobstacles  #widow  #widowhood  #survivingloss 
So when we have a moment of joy or see a flicker of light - we find a way to become present because we know those moments are fleeting. You smile bigger, laugh louder...And love harder.
So when we have a moment of joy or see a flicker of light - we find a way to become present because we know those moments are fleeting. You smile bigger, laugh louder...And love harder.
I’m sorry if I seem different ... there’s a lot more going on on the inside then what we show. Those of us grieving we all grieve in different ways and it changes us. It changes our outlook. It changes our mindset. It changed us completely. Be kind. Be patient. Accept the new us. Repost from @hopeforwidows #hopeforwidows #widows #youngwidow #griefjourney #hope #widowhood #hangon #griefawareness #griefsupport #widowsofinstagram #emotionalrollercoster #griefsucks #griefishardwork #grieflookslikethis #dontjudgewhatyoudontunderstand #hopesisters
I’m sorry if I seem different ... there’s a lot more going on on the inside then what we show. Those of us grieving we all grieve in different ways and it changes us. It changes our outlook. It changes our mindset. It changed us completely. Be kind. Be patient. Accept the new us. Repost from @hopeforwidows #hopeforwidows  #widows  #youngwidow  #griefjourney  #hope  #widowhood  #hangon  #griefawareness  #griefsupport  #widowsofinstagram  #emotionalrollercoster  #griefsucks  #griefishardwork  #grieflookslikethis  #dontjudgewhatyoudontunderstand  #hopesisters 
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 88: Roll the window down, feel the wind in your face, and breathe.
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Today's FJP is one of the simplest joys out there. Just take it all in and appreciate the moment. As I drove back north before the 40 degree drop in temperature, I turned up my music, rolled down the windows, and took in the morning smells of the back country. These moments are fleeting, so breathe them in and don't let them pass you by.
#ForcedJoyProject , Day 88: Roll the window down, feel the wind in your face, and breathe. . Today's FJP is one of the simplest joys out there. Just take it all in and appreciate the moment. As I drove back north before the 40 degree drop in temperature, I turned up my music, rolled down the windows, and took in the morning smells of the back country. These moments are fleeting, so breathe them in and don't let them pass you by.
Knowing this is one of the things that keeps me going...❤️#prematurewidow #widowadvocate #widowhood
#NEVERFORGETFAUST 
#🎹 #🙌 #🌎 #🎶 #🌧 #💛
Faust Tribute by @acespitz62 .
#noteasytodo #thanku #neverforgetfaust #🎹
Faust Tribute by @sippinwitsammie 🙏
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#noteasytodo #thanku #neverforgetfaust 🎹
#DropSomethin 🔥
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#NeverForgetFaust #🎹
@sippinwitsammie @acespitz62
#Trillshit 🙌💯🎶🔥💪
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#NeverForgetFaust #🎹
@acespitz62 @officialghettoreese @sippinwitsammie
These guys are the trillest! 🙌 @acespitz62 @sippinwitsammie @officialghettoreese Thank you for dedicating your performance to Faust! I know he was smiling down 🙏 #NeverForgetFaust 🎹
These guys are the trillest! 🙌 @acespitz62 @sippinwitsammie @officialghettoreese Thank you for dedicating your performance to Faust! I know he was smiling down 🙏 #NeverForgetFaust  🎹
Thank you Sammie @sippinwitsammie for your kind words and for the genuine love & suppport you continuously share for Faust 🙏 #NeverForgetFaust 🎹 #FlyBoyFridays @glocawear
Thank you Sammie @sippinwitsammie for your kind words and for the genuine love & suppport you continuously share for Faust 🙏 #NeverForgetFaust  🎹 #FlyBoyFridays  @glocawear
Thank you Ace 🙏 @acespitz62 for dedicating your show last Friday to Faust. It meant the world to me! It was an amazing night of honor. Thank you to everyone who came out & supported. #NeverForgetFaust 🎹 @kabraham05 @officialghettoreese @sippinwitsammie @chaosthetorch357 @tharealeighty6_tone
Thank you Ace 🙏 @acespitz62 for dedicating your show last Friday to Faust. It meant the world to me! It was an amazing night of honor. Thank you to everyone who came out & supported. #NeverForgetFaust  🎹 @kabraham05 @officialghettoreese @sippinwitsammie @chaosthetorch357 @tharealeighty6_tone
#theeleventh - As I'm in Toronto at the moment, it feels appropriate to share this photo from the first time I brought D home to meet my family. Since then, he had always loved coming to visit, mainly so he could capitalise on my dad's awesome chef skills. Secretly, we wanted to give Toronto a try once we had completed our family. My fave memory of him here is that - without fail - he would clog the main toilet every... single... visit. It forced him to wake my cousin Joan and mom to unclog it at 3 am multiple times.... the shame.
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#gratitude #toronto #torontolife #widowhood #youngwidow #lovestory #family #missyouD
#theeleventh  - As I'm in Toronto at the moment, it feels appropriate to share this photo from the first time I brought D home to meet my family. Since then, he had always loved coming to visit, mainly so he could capitalise on my dad's awesome chef skills. Secretly, we wanted to give Toronto a try once we had completed our family. My fave memory of him here is that - without fail - he would clog the main toilet every... single... visit. It forced him to wake my cousin Joan and mom to unclog it at 3 am multiple times.... the shame. . . . . #gratitude  #toronto  #torontolife  #widowhood  #youngwidow  #lovestory  #family  #missyouD 
"I remember walking out of the hospital on that sunny day in May, feeling like I had walked into another world, another life. Not mine or the one I knew. It was like we had walked in as a family of two, but I came out as a party of one.

Was this really happening? Do I keep walking? What if I walked back into the hospital? Would it change everything back to the way it was? What am I supposed to do now? How do you live as a brand new widow? ...... It was as if everything I had ever known or worked for was stripped away from me. The woman I had become, the woman I was working on, the woman I was building – she was no longer.

I found myself asking, Who am I now? What’s my identity?"🌿 My guest #blogpost is live on my dear friend's @dorinagilmore blog 💞 All Things New: Life Beyond the Hospital Doors 🌿

I've wanted to share these words for a very long time, but the emotion was so difficult to put into words. It's such a hard thing to explain to friends and family.

Please feel free to share and send to anyone who may need to hear these words 🙏💖 {Find the full post #ontheblog today, #linkinbio ⬆️}
"I remember walking out of the hospital on that sunny day in May, feeling like I had walked into another world, another life. Not mine or the one I knew. It was like we had walked in as a family of two, but I came out as a party of one. Was this really happening? Do I keep walking? What if I walked back into the hospital? Would it change everything back to the way it was? What am I supposed to do now? How do you live as a brand new widow? ...... It was as if everything I had ever known or worked for was stripped away from me. The woman I had become, the woman I was working on, the woman I was building – she was no longer. I found myself asking, Who am I now? What’s my identity?"🌿 My guest #blogpost  is live on my dear friend's @dorinagilmore blog 💞 All Things New: Life Beyond the Hospital Doors 🌿 I've wanted to share these words for a very long time, but the emotion was so difficult to put into words. It's such a hard thing to explain to friends and family. Please feel free to share and send to anyone who may need to hear these words 🙏💖 {Find the full post #ontheblog  today, #linkinbio  ⬆️}
A few weeks ago, Czech journalist, Judita Matyášová, wrote me to tell me the story about a young woman who opened up the conversation about loss in her country. "In my country it is also big taboo talking about young widows, rarely see stories of them in media, but there is one, who opened this Pandora´s box. Her name is Veronika, she had boyfriend for fifteen years, they had two children and she was pregnant (4 months) when her husband had an accident during his work day. After few hours she got a call from hospital, he died. Veronika knew the only way, how to express all that sorrow: write about everything, very openly. She was already blogger in that time, not famous one, but she had growing community of fans. When she published an article about death, it was like a storm. So many women from whole country contacted her, this was in 2015. From that time, she published books and articles, she is really opening gates for discussion."
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She asked if she could feature my #welcometowidowhood series along with Veronika's story. It was published yesterday. The headline reads “Life after death.”
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This publication, Vlasta, is the largest magazine in the Czech Republic and the oldest women's magazine.
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#grief #widowhood #journalism #czechrepublic #czechia #portrait #nowawidowstillawife
A few weeks ago, Czech journalist, Judita Matyášová, wrote me to tell me the story about a young woman who opened up the conversation about loss in her country. "In my country it is also big taboo talking about young widows, rarely see stories of them in media, but there is one, who opened this Pandora´s box. Her name is Veronika, she had boyfriend for fifteen years, they had two children and she was pregnant (4 months) when her husband had an accident during his work day. After few hours she got a call from hospital, he died. Veronika knew the only way, how to express all that sorrow: write about everything, very openly. She was already blogger in that time, not famous one, but she had growing community of fans. When she published an article about death, it was like a storm. So many women from whole country contacted her, this was in 2015. From that time, she published books and articles, she is really opening gates for discussion." . She asked if she could feature my #welcometowidowhood  series along with Veronika's story. It was published yesterday. The headline reads “Life after death.” . This publication, Vlasta, is the largest magazine in the Czech Republic and the oldest women's magazine. . #grief  #widowhood  #journalism  #czechrepublic  #czechia  #portrait  #nowawidowstillawife 
Back in October I completed my first marathon. I made a shirt with @spreadshirtusa for the race:
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“My grief made me do it”
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Fast forward to January and @widowdarkthirty has cleaned the shirt up and has made it available for purchase. Whether it’s loss of a husband, or another family member or a friend, the loss might be what fuels you to achieve unimaginable things. My husbands loss didn’t hold me back but instead it propelled me to go beyond my comfort zone and become the best version I could ever be. Thank you @gabeeaster for giving my grief a voice and I hope others can use their hurt and pain to become even better too 🙌👏
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#widow #widowhood #widowlife #widowdarkthirty #discount #discountcode #sale #mygriefmademedoit #loss #lossofalovedone #death #grief #bereavement #runchat #runner #motivation #marathontraining #marathoner #cancersucks
Back in October I completed my first marathon. I made a shirt with @spreadshirtusa for the race: . “My grief made me do it” . . Fast forward to January and @widowdarkthirty has cleaned the shirt up and has made it available for purchase. Whether it’s loss of a husband, or another family member or a friend, the loss might be what fuels you to achieve unimaginable things. My husbands loss didn’t hold me back but instead it propelled me to go beyond my comfort zone and become the best version I could ever be. Thank you @gabeeaster for giving my grief a voice and I hope others can use their hurt and pain to become even better too 🙌👏 . . #widow  #widowhood  #widowlife  #widowdarkthirty  #discount  #discountcode  #sale  #mygriefmademedoit  #loss  #lossofalovedone  #death  #grief  #bereavement  #runchat  #runner  #motivation  #marathontraining  #marathoner  #cancersucks 
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 86: Road trip perks.
So in Igbo land, if a woman builds a life and house with her husband and he dies before they could have a child, the man's brother or nephew should inherit the land because the woman is not worth inheriting it according to tradition and because she has no legal child?

ANY LAWYERS HERE?

Plus even if its legal, where is the humanness of anyone that put up this tradition and the educated people who uphold it?

#Nigeria 
#Igboland
#Culture
#widowhood
So in Igbo land, if a woman builds a life and house with her husband and he dies before they could have a child, the man's brother or nephew should inherit the land because the woman is not worth inheriting it according to tradition and because she has no legal child? ANY LAWYERS HERE? Plus even if its legal, where is the humanness of anyone that put up this tradition and the educated people who uphold it? #Nigeria  #Igboland  #Culture  #widowhood 
I was so blessed to have had that light shine in my life for 15 years.❤ Chris left a light that touched many and it radiates through our children.

Be the light in YOUR world! The light that shines on long after you are gone.

Take the time to play with your children.  Call and visit your parents. 
Touch base with friends regularly. 
Smile at strangers. 
Give without expecting anything in return.
Help neighbors.
Love yourself.

#shine #bethelight #lifeafterloss #griefawareness #griefjourney #loveneverdies #love #wellnesscoach #lifeisshort #loveisstrongerthandeath #bekind #coach #grief #widowhood #widow #icarryyouwithme #untilwemeetagain
I was so blessed to have had that light shine in my life for 15 years.❤ Chris left a light that touched many and it radiates through our children. Be the light in YOUR world! The light that shines on long after you are gone. Take the time to play with your children. Call and visit your parents. Touch base with friends regularly. Smile at strangers. Give without expecting anything in return. Help neighbors. Love yourself. #shine  #bethelight  #lifeafterloss  #griefawareness  #griefjourney  #loveneverdies  #love  #wellnesscoach  #lifeisshort  #loveisstrongerthandeath  #bekind  #coach  #grief  #widowhood  #widow  #icarryyouwithme  #untilwemeetagain 
Honored to be featured in finance mag Kiplinger for my leadership, advocacy and raising an important conversation around women and money in marriage and  #widowhood. Here are the facts that many women are not receiving, until it’s too late. May more be educated, may more find the financial security from decisions and choices made today. @modernwidowsclub is at the forefront and ahead of the curve driving this conversation because unnecessary grief and regret are difficult to overcome! Let’s be smarter in this generation of empowerment. 70% of wives will face #widowhood, let’s not ignore those facts and play dumb due to our fears. Let’s face this topic with the respect it deserves and increase our chances of a vital life with or without a partner. #financialplanner #CFP #CPA #widowadvocate https://www.kiplinger.com/article/retirement/T021-C032-S014-a-guide-for-widows-and-the-people-near-to-them.html?pmtn=article03
Honored to be featured in finance mag Kiplinger for my leadership, advocacy and raising an important conversation around women and money in marriage and #widowhood . Here are the facts that many women are not receiving, until it’s too late. May more be educated, may more find the financial security from decisions and choices made today. @modernwidowsclub is at the forefront and ahead of the curve driving this conversation because unnecessary grief and regret are difficult to overcome! Let’s be smarter in this generation of empowerment. 70% of wives will face #widowhood , let’s not ignore those facts and play dumb due to our fears. Let’s face this topic with the respect it deserves and increase our chances of a vital life with or without a partner. #financialplanner  #CFP  #CPA  #widowadvocate  https://www.kiplinger.com/article/retirement/T021-C032-S014-a-guide-for-widows-and-the-people-near-to-them.html?pmtn=article03
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 85: This kid + a birthday + Urban exploration = Pure Joy.
#ForcedJoyProject, Day 84: Dune makes everything fancy (including very unfancy roadside motels).
#ForcedJoyProject , Day 84: Dune makes everything fancy (including very unfancy roadside motels).
9 years ago we were getting ready to be married in 9 days. It doesn’t just feel like a lifetime ago; it feels like someone else’s life completely. Except I can remember it like it was yesterday. I can still feel your arm around me like it is here. I can still hear your voice laughing and telling me you love me. I can still see the band on your ring finger for the first time. And it wasn’t someone else’s heart that was broken when you died, it was mine. It feels like all those pieces of my heart were scattered to the wind and I’ve been spending the last year and a half finding them. All of that searching has made me a new person with some pieces still missing. I’m still learning how to live in a world where you aren’t breathing. It seems impossible that the world could bear to go on turning without you in it, that I could bear waking up over 500 mornings even though you were dead, but I did it. That’s how I know I can keep on doing it. Sometimes it hurts so much I don’t know how I can stand it, and sometimes it’s completely effortless. Most of the time it’s somewhere in the middle. I think this month will always be the hardest for me. Remembering how much we loved each other and how happy we made each other, only for it to end much sooner than we thought it would when this picture was taken. #grief #grieving #widow #widowhood #weddinganniversary
9 years ago we were getting ready to be married in 9 days. It doesn’t just feel like a lifetime ago; it feels like someone else’s life completely. Except I can remember it like it was yesterday. I can still feel your arm around me like it is here. I can still hear your voice laughing and telling me you love me. I can still see the band on your ring finger for the first time. And it wasn’t someone else’s heart that was broken when you died, it was mine. It feels like all those pieces of my heart were scattered to the wind and I’ve been spending the last year and a half finding them. All of that searching has made me a new person with some pieces still missing. I’m still learning how to live in a world where you aren’t breathing. It seems impossible that the world could bear to go on turning without you in it, that I could bear waking up over 500 mornings even though you were dead, but I did it. That’s how I know I can keep on doing it. Sometimes it hurts so much I don’t know how I can stand it, and sometimes it’s completely effortless. Most of the time it’s somewhere in the middle. I think this month will always be the hardest for me. Remembering how much we loved each other and how happy we made each other, only for it to end much sooner than we thought it would when this picture was taken. #grief  #grieving  #widow  #widowhood  #weddinganniversary 
After my fireplace fiasco, what better way to make myself feel any more miserable but to take out my wedding album to have myself a good cry. However, the first picture I saw was this one.. it made my heart happy and I smiled. It reminded me what I have now. Great friendships, family, love and support. #thatsmybestfriend #bestie #shescrazierthanme #thickasthieves #nofairweatherfriends #weddingdress #maidofhonor #memories #widowhood
❤️Until the very end❤️
#us
❤️Until the very end❤️ #us 
Regardless of what life throws at us we still have the free will to choose our own path. Choose wisely.
Regardless of what life throws at us we still have the free will to choose our own path. Choose wisely.
This photo, taken over the holidays, is near and dear to my heart — my son and his Grandmomma Etelle (my late husband’s mother). Talking about family dynamics with our late spouses’ families on the blog today — something we get asked about a lot. Link in bio.
This photo, taken over the holidays, is near and dear to my heart — my son and his Grandmomma Etelle (my late husband’s mother). Talking about family dynamics with our late spouses’ families on the blog today — something we get asked about a lot. Link in bio.