The stories we’ve read over the past 24 hours have not been overreactions or false narratives. That uncomfortable feeling in your gut, that desire to push back against their truth via trite levelings of “not all men” is either (1) your unremarkable engagement of patriarchy or (2) your earnest desire to believe that we’re better than this. While both exist on two different moral planes, they are equal in their detriment to advancing the safety and overall well-being of women in this world. Stop providing a counter argument to someone’s story of sexual assault. Stop offering solutions that attempt to correct the behaviors of the victim. Stop belittling women through the misguided lens of “I’m just paying her a compliment!” You’re not. Stop saying “You’re just being emotional!” Stop being dusty, in general. But if all of that is just too much to ask, there’s one simple solution: Just shut the fuck up.
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1 in 3 women will be sexually or physically assaulted in her lifetime and 1 in 3 women has been sexually harassed at work. I worry for the conversations I have to have with my daughter as she moves from girl to woman, and sadly, realize the age I expect is "right" will also probably be too late.
I am so proud of the women coming forward to share their stories. In the telling we are shedding light on our dirty secret and my hope is that male allies will open their eyes to something they've long since brushed off as "locker room talk." Let's normalize the telling of these transgressions, refusing to be ashamed. After all, we cannot take on the sins of another. Someone's bad behavior does not have to be our secret.
Much love to all who are triggered, who are embarrassed, who are tired of all this shit. I feel you.
I saw the following quote by Jackson Katz today and it hit me right in the chest, as if someone punched me. .
“We talk about how many women were raped last year, not about how many men raped women.
We talk about how many girls in a school district were harassed last year, not about how many boys harassed girls. We talk about how many teenage girls in the state of Vermont got pregnant last year, rather than how many men and boys impregnated teenage girls."
"So you can see how the use of the passive voice has a political effect. It shifts the focus off of men and boys and onto girls and women. Even the term ‘violence against women’ is problematic. It’s a passive construction; there’s no active agent in the sentence.
It’s a bad thing that happens to women, but when you look at that term ’violence against women,’ nobody is doing it to them. It just happens to them. Men aren’t even a part of it.”
Why is this ours?
Dear men, please rise to this moment. Please take this conversation on for us and with us. We need you. #heforshe
She remembered swimming when everything was easy, as a child. It was the thing that she loved the most. The feel of the water on her body had always been something special to her. She missed it. She missed the happiness of it. The hot weather that came with it. That called for it. That took her out of school early when it was too scorching to bear and the schools would surrender to the call of the big blue. Before the boys from school turn up as teenagers. And her body changed and the men turned their heads. The rules changed. Before the boys would taunt her the next day. Nobody ever told her that this would happen. That the rules would change. That monitoring would be required. She didn't want this body. That was neither fat nor thin. She didn't want the other girls body either. The one they taunted for other reasons. Approving reasons.
She wanted to be a boy. For it not to matter what her body looked like when she wanted to swim. Because no matter what, this girls body, it seemed, was now only an object for the boys to judge. To tease. To want. Or reject. It wasn't hers anymore it seemed. It was the property of the patriarchy.
Eventually the swimsuits she outwore were thrown away and never replaced.
Eventually she forgot the excitement of the pool. And the hunger for food she always had afterwards. But she never forgot how much she loved it. And on this hot summers day, she sat there on the grass watching the boys diving
And she wished she was a child again. Swimming. #swimming#summer
In talking about Harvey Weinstein and recounting the multiple times inappropriate things were done to her by Weinstein and other people in the movie industry, Molly Ringwald finished with this to say ⬆️ the problem @mollyringwald is that Trump didn't do anything... yet your silence, everyone else's silence, hollywoods silence actually enabled a real predator to continue abusing & intimidating women... where's the #womensmarch for this? Too busy counting your bills to protest real injustice? I guess it's okay since he's a democrat. Actually Ms Ringwald, the men if they're lucky, get to have no one doing a damn thing so they get to continue doing what they want to countless women for many years, which is exactly what happened to Harvey ... #liberalhypocracy#shameonhollywood#liberalssuck#weinstein Please follow my awesome partners:
From 'The Handmaid's Tale' book. First edition Folio Society, written by Margaret Atwood and illustrated by Anna & Elena Balbusso. .
صبح توی تخت از من پرسید: "به نظرت توی بسته چیه؟"
اون وقتی از صبح بود که ساعت زنگ خورده، خاموش شده و نور از پنجره های اتاق سرریز است. سرم رو گذاشتم روی سینه ش و گفتم "کتاب، به نظرم کتابه" و چشمهام رو بستم.
تصاویری که می بینید بخشی از چاپ مصور کتابِ 'سرگذشت ندیمه' نوشته ی مارگرت اتوود هستند. نویسنده و دوقلوی تصویرگر کتاب، هرسه زن اند.
اتوود دیستوپیا یا پادآرمانشهری را تصویر می کند که حاصل به قدرت رسیدن مسیحیت اصولگرا درآمریکاست. گیلیاد، سرزمین جدید، یک دیکتاتوری مذهبی ست وفادار به تعالیم عهد قدیم، که حقوق شهروندی و به خصوص حقوق زنان را زیر پا می گذارد. به طور مثال زنان از خواندن و نوشتن محروم اند، به دو دسته ی بارور و نابارور تقسیم می شوند و تنها وظیفه شان به دنیا آوردن فرزند است.
کتاب در سال ۱۹٨۵ نوشته شده اما سال گذشته با داغ شدن بحث اختیاری بودن سقط جنین در آمریکا و راهپیمایی های زنان علیه سیاست های ترامپ دوباره به لیست پرفروش ترین ها رسید.
سوال و جواب بالا مربوط به یکی از اپیزودهای سریال 'سرگذت ندیمه'ست که بر مبنای همین کتاب ساخته شده و با هم می بینیم. امشب قسمت آخر را دیدیم و داستان ماند به گیره ی پرتگاه. حالا باید کتاب را پیدا کنم و باقیش را بخوانم.
لذت تماشای فیلم اما خیلی زیاد بود، اگرچه دردهایش عمیق اند و خشونت اش دریده است و ترس هایش بسیار نزدیک، روایت بصری فیلم آنقدر زیباست که شوکرانِ ندیمه یِ راوی را قطره قطره می شود نوشید. سبزها و سرخ های روپوش زنان در هر صحنه انگار از نقاشی های کلاسیک کلیسا برخواسته اند، با کیفیت و ایستاییِ ضربه های قلم مو. و نور، نور چه در صبح آشپزخانه، چه در انزوای دادگاه یا تجمل سرسرای مهمانی، همه انگار زاده ی رده های نوری کهنه اند که با دقت در شعاعی معلوم به تصویر کشیده شده، مثل نور وحی در دل ابرها، یا نور پشت سر ابراهیم به وقت قربانی کردن اسماعیل. وآدم ها در گفت و گوهایشان یا غرق اند در آیه های تکراری از انجیل یا عبارت هایی گویای احساسات مطلق، رنج مطلق، نفرت مطلق، لذت مطلق.
در آن صبح پاییز که وقت بیدار شدن بود انگار هنوز توی داستان سریال شب گذشته بودیم، بدون اینکه صبح بخیر بگوییم پرسید در بسته چیست و بدون اینکه بپرسم کدام بسته گفتم کتاب. تمام.
"New York activist Tamika Mallory says she was booted from an American Airlines flight in Miami after a pilot inserted himself into a dispute over her seat assignment.
Mallory, a co-chair of the Women’s March on Washington, was traveling home to New York when the pilot followed her to scold her over an argument she had with a gate agent." https://www.google.com/amp/www.nydailynews.com/amp/new-york/pilot-boots-new-york-activist-american-airlines-flight-article-1.3564865 #istandwithtamika#americanairlines#womensday#womensmarch
To the man who cat-called me when I was 12. .
To the man who threw me - a complete stranger - over your shoulder in Denver and nearly walked out of the bar with me to do God knows what.
To the man who picked me up by my ass in that one club in Vegas and wouldn't put me down.
To that man that said I was "asking for it" because my dress was a little short. .
To that one guy who slipped something into my drink.
To the people (male AND female) who were supposed to be my friends and protect me but ended up leaving 16 year old me on a bathroom floor to die, alone and violated.
To all of you, you are the reason I have to say #metoo .
I'm fine now, but it took a long time for me to know it wasn't my fault. It didn't matter what I was wearing or where I was. It didn't matter because it wasn't me. I could have been anyone. It was you. YOU own that, not me. You own that pain and fear. You own those scars. That is your damage and your doing.
It took me a long time to absolve myself of all those sins that were not mine to own. My only hope is that you carry the weight of them.
Because my god, they are heavy. .
*last post disappeared so I wanted to reshare because while this is very raw, this is important. I tagged the women I constantly look up to and respect. Thank you for helping myself and so many others see that we are not alone.*
"I stand on the sacrificies of a million women before me. Thinking, what can I do to make this mountain taller, so the women after me, can see farther."
You are strong, powerful, beautiful. We will fight, and will never surrender. #MeToo#WomensMarch
Let’s laugh and then punch the system 👊 “When all else fails, wear a mustache so everyone sees you as more manlike. This will cancel out any need to change your leadership style. In fact, you may even get a quick promotion!” - @thecooperreview
This past January I had the opportunity to photograph the Women's March in Chicago. Nearly 250,000 people filled the streets of downtown Chicago to "send a bold message to our new government on their first day in office, and to the world, that women's rights are human rights." Standing at the corner of Jackson and Michigan, it was truly astounding to be surrounded by so much #kindness , #compassion , #respectfulness , #hope , and #love . As #metoo engulfs Facebook, Twitter, etc. I'm reminded of one other thing I witnessed that unseasonably warm day in January: #strength . Behind every #metoo , posted and unposted, is remarkable strength. Inside every sexual assault and sexual harassment survivor - because that's what we are, #wearesurvivors - is remarkable strength. I know sexual assault and sexual harassment is not exclusively experienced by women...so let me add to this woman's poster: sexual assault and sexual harassment survivors are STRONG AS HELL. And let me give credit where it is due: thank you endlessly to @fortyisthenew40 for beginning this movement years ago. "The power of using 'me too' has always been in the fact that it can be a conversation starter or the whole conversation - but it was us talking to us." • #chicagophotographer#womensmarchchicago#womensmarch#chitown#womensrightsarehumanrights#femalesarestrongashell#strongashell#peacefulassembly#taranaburke#metoomovement
The past three days have been eye opening finding out on social media how many strong, amazing women I know have been sexually assaulted and sexually harassed. I never realized how much I wasn’t alone. Know that despite the darkness we’ve all felt as victims we will not let it extinguish our lights. I support you and will stand with you- we will create change. We have to. #MeToo#womenempowerment#womensmarch#womensupportingwomen#leanin#changetheworld
The #MeToo campaign to raise awareness of sexual violence spread across social media yesterday after actress Alyssa Milano ignited its fire on twitter. But the movement was originally conceived 10 years ago by Tarana Burke, a black female activist. Above we have reposted a video from her own account - here she speaks volumes about the power of uniting to #EndSexualViolence